Hairbrained Ideas R Us

-or-How to Kill a Sunday AfternoonStep 1. Gather kids and husband. Say to kids and husband, "I bet you I can cut a watermelon in h..

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Hairbrained Ideas R Us

07/29/2014 22:04:02 PM

-or-How to Kill a Sunday AfternoonStep 1. Gather kids and husband. Say to kids and husband, "I bet you I can cut a watermelon in half using only rubber bands."Step 2. Watch while family scoffs and declares you crazy.Step 3. Produce watermelon.And lar


07/27/2014 14:35:00 PM

I'm not entirely a photography purist even though I lean more toward SOOC shots and almost always prefer the cropping I do with my eye in the viewfinder to any improvement I can make later with the crop tool.

Skeleton in the Closet

07/26/2014 14:04:22 PM

Meet the only child who had to fight her parents in order to go into the closet.

Herbs Drying in the Window

07/22/2014 07:00:06 AM

And yes, it smells fantastic in my kitchen right now.

Stuffed Bird of Hope

07/20/2014 17:56:51 PM

A recent storm blew this nest and two robin's eggs from one of our trees.

What it Means Is We Better Not Forget Dinner

07/19/2014 17:08:28 PM

"There are two ways to look at today: either we didn't feed our children lunch or we didn't feed our children breakfast.


07/18/2014 05:30:02 AM

The real discovery of our Blobfest weekend was not campy street festivals, nor tin foil hat and scream contests, but a new favorite artist.

It Crawls, It Creeps, It Eats You Alive!

07/16/2014 16:46:38 PM

I had a bad case of gottagetouttatown week last week and I've always been a bit obsessed with The Blob in all its iterations, but in particular, the 1958 original with Steve McQueen.

Rock Island

07/14/2014 11:12:13 AM

Last weekend, The Music Man (the Robert Preston and Shirley Jones version) was on television and I forced let my kids watch it.

I'm Raising a Freaking Genius

07/07/2014 17:13:32 PM

I've often thought I should just run a voice activated tape recorder in the kitchen to catch all the errant words of wisdom that might be uttered there because I probably miss half of them as The Caterpillar and The Dormouse talk to each other while

Suck It, Pinterest

07/06/2014 14:09:32 PM

Monica and I went to a friend's baby shower a few days ago and they were playing a game with clothespins where you got three clothespins when you walked in and if someone heard you say the word baby, they could take one of your clothespins and then t

The Calm Before the Storm

07/03/2014 10:52:35 AM

And then Godzilla, Mothra and the LaserCat destroyed the city.

Coming in with the Golden Light

06/28/2014 08:17:53 AM

I love these little Dreamtime strawflowers, not just because they remind me of that Kate Bush song and it's one of my all-time favorite albums, but also because they close up like little golfballs at night and then open in the day to this.

Good Morning, Chrysler, How YOU Doin?

06/21/2014 06:50:10 AM

I made a quick trip to Manhattan last weekend for a friend's baby shower and we stayed at a hotel just up the block from the Chrysler building.

You've Been Schooled

06/20/2014 17:18:41 PM

Caterpillar: "Dad, what rhymes with apple?"KoH: "Hmmm... maybe... Crap hole?"Caterpillar: "I was thinking something appropriate."

Black-Eyed Susan

06/15/2014 08:00:01 AM

It's the Maryland state flower and yet for some reason, I have never been able to make them grow in my yard.

Uses for an Old Basketball Hoop

06/12/2014 07:57:01 AM

The KingofHearts made this when we decided to get rid of the basketball hoop that was in tatters but then got lazy and never went to the effort to remove the pole from the ground. He made the hooks on the forge (one of the forges) in the backyard and

That's here. That's home. That's us.

06/11/2014 17:50:35 PM

This little bit of prose, written by someone who has more facility with language that I will ever hope to obtain, has come to mean a great deal to me and I was reminded of it recently.

Playing Favorites

06/10/2014 17:34:18 PM

*The Caterpillar playing with my guitar*

Dealing with the Oddity of Time Travel with the Greatest of Ease

06/08/2014 16:30:33 PM

We got home from church today and The Shortlings wanted to do something together,

It's a Fair Cop

06/07/2014 06:09:08 AM

Snapped with my phone through the windshield of the car while coming back from the Eastern shore last week.


06/02/2014 19:25:33 PM

Heading back home over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge makes me a little bit nostalgic.I'm totally becoming a Marylander... as the can of Old Bay in my spice rack that I sprinkled on my potato salad last week will confirm.

Bewildering Conversations, vol. xxxi

06/01/2014 19:15:19 PM

"Dad, you remind me of a tool...."*silence*"...because you help me. And tools help people.""Well, thank you.

A Land Far Away Beside the Crystal Fountains

05/29/2014 11:12:40 AM

School is coming to an end soon and while this year has been a better year than last, so I'm not necessarily jumping up and down and yelling HOORAY!, I'm still pretty happy about it.Look, I love school and I want these Shortlings to learn to love the

Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear, Touch the Ground

05/28/2014 16:51:01 PM

Wondering what that weirdo woman who pulled off the road, then got out of her car and stood on the curb fiddling with her phone was doing the other day?Probably taking a picture of this roadside memorial:We suppose two possible scenarios for what hap

Rubber Ducky, You're the One

05/27/2014 20:56:56 PM

Memorial Day weekend started out fairly normally for us.

In Defense of Nick Burns

05/22/2014 18:39:44 PM

I realize that computer techies get a lot of guff from the rest of us.

Career Development

05/18/2014 14:46:36 PM

This ridiculous little document came home with The Caterpillar this weekend.

Ira Gershwin, We're Not

05/06/2014 16:47:50 PM

So, taking my kids to see that Frozen movie on opening weekend proved to be a huge misstep as we've had to listen to them sing those songs over and over for months now.

Bewildering Conversations in the Back Seat

05/02/2014 19:08:13 PM

After a round of bathroom jokes designed to make any eleven year old boy happy followed by hysterical laughter from two children and two adults who probably should know better:"Aaaaaah."

Rainy Day Daisy

04/29/2014 13:41:58 PM

A Spoonful of Apple Pie

04/26/2014 20:15:12 PM

Rough day today.

We Are Siamese

04/23/2014 16:52:00 PM

These are not the greatest pictures -- they are snapped from my phone, because, as anyone who has cats knows, when you see a cat doing something interesting and/or cute, you have no time to go find your camera and take a proper picture - even if it i

Buried Treasure

04/22/2014 16:34:01 PM

This week, we ordered a bunch of gravel for an unnamed project The KingofHearts has going on in the backyard.

Easter Gratitude

04/21/2014 17:11:12 PM

Easter was pretty low-key, as it generally is in our house. We threw some plastic eggs in the yard in the dark the night before for The Shortlings to find the next morning and for the squirrels to find even before then. We always end up with few plas

Spring... Finally

04/21/2014 16:27:40 PM

It's hard to believe it, I know, but it's Spring.

It Means Corners or Intersections of Geometric Shapes*

04/18/2014 06:17:00 AM

Dormouse: "OW!"KingofHearts: "What happened?"DM: "OWW.

Core Strength

04/17/2014 06:00:10 AM

Every night before The Shortlings go to bed, The KingofHearts reads to them.

Cherry Blossoms

04/16/2014 10:28:00 AM

Speaking of cherry blossoms, believe it or not, the Tidal Basin is not the only place in D.C. where you can see them blooming. It's just the only place where a tourist can easily push you into the water while trying to take his fiftieth picture of a


04/15/2014 10:22:20 AM

It's finally spring in the nation's capitol, so we endeavored to make a day of it this weekend and spend some time outside.

Anatomy of a Fit

04/09/2014 17:10:55 PM

Last weekend I got The KingofHearts and I tickets to see The Manhattan Transfer, because - and I do not think I am not exaggerating here - they are the greatest singing group known to mankind.

Gimme All Your Luvin

04/06/2014 06:33:51 AM

So much going on from now until the end of school, I often forget to feed The Children, which is how we ended up in the Burger King drive-through the other night.

This Post is Not Yet Rated

03/29/2014 07:40:23 AM

I only heard the punchline to this conversation so I don't know how it started.

And That's Exactly What The Paragraph Said

03/26/2014 16:51:05 PM

"Mom, can you read the introduction to my science project?""Sure." *reads entire thing aloud*"You like it?""Yes.""Is it good?"

Snowcovered Latticework

03/25/2014 09:35:14 AM

It's the sixth day of Spring and it's snowing. No one's very happy about it, but look how pretty:

Spring Snowstorm

03/19/2014 17:30:13 PM

So how was your St. Patrick's Day?

A St. Patrick's Day Story

03/17/2014 20:26:56 PM

Last year we were invited to St. Patrick's Day dinner at the house of an acquaintance at church. They promised corned beef and cabbage and even though I didn't know these people well, I agreed because they were Irish and CORNED BEEF.I don't know if I

Movember Comes a Bit Early

03/16/2014 19:58:00 PM

This is how we all left the dentist's office last week. In unrelated news, people seem to be staring at me and my family a lot lately.

Minutae - Text Message Edition

03/14/2014 16:24:09 PM

A series of loving, yet helpful and communicative text messages between me and my husband. Now imagine the stuff that I didn't deem fit to republish on the Interweb.chickenpotchickenpotchickenpotpieAre you home?Who dis?I'll take that as a yes. chicke

Huddled Together Trying to Figure Out What to Call Ourselves

03/11/2014 11:38:40 AM

Long time no write, eh?

Do You Like Fish? Well, He Likes You Too...

02/22/2014 07:12:49 AM

The Caterpillar came through the door in a tizzy yesterday.


02/21/2014 07:00:12 AM

Yesterday at work, we had a meeting with a bunch of people who could potentially give us a bunch of money, so I was asked to be a part of the dog and pony show and participate in a presentation to convince this bunch of people why we were not only de

Like a Big Pizza Pie

02/20/2014 15:57:01 PM

*commotion in kitchen*Dormouse: "STOPPPP ITTTTTT!"*more commotion, then silence. Caterpillar walks sheepishly around the corner and heads toward another room*


02/19/2014 15:47:54 PM

If only she would be clear about what she likes to do with her time.

Crimes Against Nature

02/11/2014 06:00:11 AM

Dear Teacher,

Cat in the Hat

02/10/2014 14:41:01 PM

This is a cat, desperately trying to pretend that The Shortlings do not exist.He's also plotting to murder me in my sleep.


02/09/2014 12:19:00 PM

When we moved into our house mumblesomething years ago, the doorbell was broken.

The Generosity, It's Astounding

02/08/2014 06:51:57 AM

Last year, we sent The Shortlings to a summer day camp.

She's Perfecting The Teenage Eye Roll

02/07/2014 06:37:49 AM

The other day when The Shortlings got home from school, I told them they each were assigned... *cue brass section* ...A Chore. One had to clean up one room and one had to clean up a different room.

Drippy Ice

02/05/2014 12:49:07 PM

Last night - when it was clear and dry and 40 degrees and we were expecting a storm, but not for like six hours - the county cancelled school and all evening activities.

Bewildering Conversations Overheard in the Kitchen

01/29/2014 15:00:21 PM

Dormouse: "You're acting weird."Caterpillar: "I am weird."Dormouse: "You just said you were weird!"Caterpillar: "There's nothing wrong with that. I was born weird."Dormouse: "You weren't born weird. You were raised weird."Caterpillar: "True."Dormouse

Another Fine Fettle You've Gotten Us Into

01/27/2014 13:36:04 PM

We decided to get a new car last week.And by "car," I mean, something I refuse to call a sport utility vehicle because a real man knows a station wagon when he sees one.

This is Water. This is Water.

01/23/2014 14:58:42 PM

When I decided to have kids, I was unsure of my ability to excel at the role.

Snowler Vortex

01/22/2014 16:01:51 PM

I'm sure that as soon as I admit this, there will be a great swell from the interwebs and an uprising will begin, but I actually love winter and snow and everything that goes along with it.

Minutiae - phone photo edition

01/17/2014 19:16:06 PM

Every once in awhile I get nervous that I'm going to randomly lose all the photos on my phone and I transfer them, one by one to a computer... so I can lose them there.

Drunk Under the Christmas Tree

01/14/2014 10:05:00 AM

This week I uncharacteristically allowed The Dormouse to take some pictures with my camera while we were waiting for a event I was photographing to start.

Shrink Wrapped

01/13/2014 15:25:01 PM


Fake Reflection

01/12/2014 08:09:01 AM

Playing with graphic filters in PhotoShop to try and salvage some pictures that I know aren't great, but still persistently like anyway. Because I am delusional and not able to recognize when it's time to give up. Here's a Sunday morning image.

Minutiae - Caterpillar edition

01/11/2014 16:30:15 PM

Over the winter break, I spent way more time with my children than is socially acceptable. Finally we came home, started back to school for one day and then a Polar Vortex came our way and closed or delayed school for, in this order: snow, freezing r

Santa 2013

01/11/2014 06:35:21 AM

This is the first year we didn't actually make it to see Santa in any official capacity with fancy outfits.

Forget Punction, Inflection is Everything

01/08/2014 16:52:08 PM

I bought this canvas in a discount store a year or so ago before I noticed that every suburban family from here to the west coast has a similar one on their wall somewhere.

Photo Dump

01/07/2014 16:34:32 PM

You know why you need a blog? To have someplace to post all your photos. It's the come over to my place and look at the slides from my vacation of the twenty-first century.I like these pictures though. So take a seat in the living room and have some

100 Songs

01/01/2014 17:03:04 PM

A couple of years ago, Rosanne Cash released an album titled The List.


01/01/2014 08:54:45 AM

I could tell you the story of my week between Christmas and New Year's Day, but your eyes would roll back into your head and you'd cover your ears and because I'd start whining like Beaker from the Muppets.

Christmas 2013

12/25/2013 03:00:02 AM

It took me way too long this year to both generate an idea for and execute Christmas cards this year, but we had a little sheltered workshop the day before yesterday and I'm pleased to announce that we mailed cards almost two whole days before Christ

Hey! Unto You a Child is Born!!!

12/24/2013 06:05:33 AM

This year I read the Shortlings The Best Christmas Paegent Ever... or rather, I downloaded the book onto my Kindle and then handed it over to The KingofHearts so he could read it to them because I only really get about three sentences in to reading a

Let the Airing of the Grievances Begin

12/23/2013 16:56:54 PM

I'm not going to get into how tired and cranky I am, because I pretty much whined about that once already this week.

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