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Everything is Obama's fault

10/22/2011 21:49:48 PM

In case you've been living under a rock for the last two years, everything wrong with the world is President Obama's fault. Budget crisis? Obama. Teen pregnancies? Obama. All My Children being canceled? Obama. That hangnail you've had for the ...

The love behind the dream

10/22/2011 21:42:01 PM

Edited to add:This post has since been syndicated by my friends at Jalopnik. You can read it over there and see the lovely responses from race fans. The title they used is not mine; I do not "let" my husband do things or deny permission to do ...

Snakes on a car

08/01/2011 17:03:25 PM

I have had it with these motherf-ing snakes on my motherf-ing car!OMG I can't even watch this video without squealing in horror. Jesus. I would do the exact same thing and not pull over. What, were they supposed to give that snake the chance ...

Is this car for the Mexicans?

07/23/2011 17:50:51 PM

I'm so naive. Perhaps it's because I'm white and grew up middle class, but I truly had no idea how much prejudice and hate existed in this world until I started doing auto show. I mean, I knew it was out there - everyone hears people they know ...

Gilbert Gottfried's eviler twin

04/01/2011 01:08:06 AM

"So, do you girls like jokes?" asked that day's grandpa du jour, wobbling ever-so-slightly from the heady mixture of his Coumadin and Bud Light.I eyed him warily. In such situations I can't exactly brusquely say no and walk away, so with a heavy ...

It's only okay if you're famous

03/13/2011 11:23:47 AM

The big auto story of last week was about how my nemesis Chrysler had a giant PR nightmare on their hands when an account executive from NMS mixed up his Twitter accounts and posted something (quite funny but corporately inappropriate) on the ...

Born this way

03/04/2011 23:29:31 PM

God makes no mistakes, says Lady Gaga.God might not make mistakes, but this guy did coming to the auto show with his face a mess.Chicago. Night shift. Almost to closing. I see him coming from the side, from a distance. The peripheral view was ...

The car humper

02/20/2011 11:23:35 AM

Why is your child dry humping my car?No really, why is your THREE YEAR OLD CHILD DRY HUMPING MY CAR????Somehow the radio still worked. Before the show starts our techs go in and remove a bunch of fuses, some for safety and some for the annoyance ...

Does HE come with the car?

02/09/2011 02:15:14 AM

I often get asked (obviously by people who never go to auto shows) if any men work there. There are a ton of guys who do the same job I do, the exact same job I do, yet no one debates whether or not they actually know anything about cars or ...

May the force be with you

02/04/2011 10:10:48 AM

Volkswagon's Super Bowl commercial is already my favorite : )

Miss Information

01/15/2011 14:42:00 PM

If we booth babes, who according to commenters on various auto blogs and websites are nothing more than window dressing and don't know crap about cars - if we booth babes know the difference between AWD and 4WD, then why doesn't whatever dealer ...

The auto show gods smile upon me

01/04/2011 00:24:00 AM

One of the happiest days of my 2010 occurred when I opened my auto show schedule for the 2011 season. Guess who's NOT going to Detroit, bitches? ME. I could only be more thrilled if I were being sent on a tantric yoga retreat with Mike Rowe.I ...

Bumper cars

12/14/2010 14:38:00 PM

I love it when my auto show brethren share on Facebook the ridiculousness that happens to them in their own displays. This comment, from a particularly inventive visitor, is one of my favorites of all time:"Are the airbags in this car on the ...

Don't touch my junk

11/20/2010 14:08:00 PM

A new insidious danger has entered my world. While traveling as often as I do has always had its annoyances, large and small (thankfully mostly small), it is about to get much, much worse.Because now I'm going to be sexually assaulted at the ...

Free polar bear hugs!

11/07/2010 01:24:00 AM

I WANT A POLAR BEAR HUG!!!!! I will buy three Nissan LEAFs if I can have three polar bear hugs. I will buy zero Nissan LEAFs if the "polar bear" is actually a pervy sales guy in a fluffy white suit.

Grodiness Avoidance System

11/05/2010 22:47:00 PM

The 2011 model auto show season is nigh and I must prepare myself for the onslaught of germs and filth brought forth by the teeming masses I encounter daily.I truly have no idea how I have not yet contracted hepatitis, leprosy, flesh eating ...

Mike Rowe is such a tease

10/13/2010 14:28:00 PM

The closest we will ever get to reenacting the hot candle wax scene from Body of Evidence with my boyfriend Mike Rowe.

Where are my panties?

10/11/2010 23:28:00 PM

The auto show lost and found is a fascinating slice of anthropologic wonder. The things people leave behind can tell you a lot about what they truly value -- or, alternately, how much you've managed to blow their minds with your vehicle, to ...

The only kid I want to see at the auto show

10/07/2010 15:21:00 PM

I am not the only person who has a problem with Unnecessary Trucks. I am also not the youngest, grouchiest, most knowledgeable or most vocal. No, that title must go to the 10-year-old son of a former Booth Bro.Brendan, who worked as a product ...

Fat and unfashionable

09/27/2010 00:36:00 AM

As you can tell, I'm an observer of people. I've noticed a recurring theme among the slice of Americans I get to spend time with on the auto show circuit: a desperate need for more episodes of What Not To Wear and a lack of dietary restraint.People. ...

Stuff your face

08/26/2010 00:40:00 AM

Photo copyright sualk61 via Creative Commons License.I recently received an email from a reader asking me about my relationship to food as a model, or more specifically if I'm a foodie since I get to travel so much. Shamefully I realized over ...


08/22/2010 02:20:00 AM

Oh boy, wouldyalookatthat. Been a while since my last update. I haven't forgotten about you, my dearies. I've simply been loving my time off. However, I will be back Sunday or Monday with a piece on everybody's favorite subject outside of sex: ...

Are you trying to kill your kids?

07/29/2010 16:56:00 PM

It's no secret that I want to kill your kids, and by the sheer neglect I see at the auto show it looks like you feel much the same.However, do me a favor and don't actually try to kill your child with your own stupidity at the auto show.I scanned ...

Shoot the gap

07/22/2010 01:28:00 AM

It's always the ones you least expect.I've heard the same story so many times from sales guys: Some guy wearing dirty old clothes comes into the dealership and is ignored by one salesperson, and when he comes back the next day in a suit (because ...

Minivan man

07/16/2010 12:18:00 PM

Last week on I discussed the various ways in which your vehicle is preventing you from getting laid. Some readers took issue with my inclusion of minivans in the list of vehicular dating no-no's, I'm assuming because they ...

Airport woes Pt 1

07/06/2010 11:23:00 AM

So obviously I travel, a lot. I travel so much that in the last four years I've earned enough miles for five free round-trip domestic airline tickets and countless first class upgrades. Most of that travel occurs December through April.I am ...