Stacey Allaster is refusing to call the to-be-designed grunt-o-meter a grunt-o-meter, so please, let's think of things to call it and send our suggestions to the WTA. But remember--if we call it a shriek-o-meter, we're allowing players who actually grunt to go on grunting. If we call it a shriek/grunt-o-meter, Yanina "Woopee!" Wickmayer and Caroline "Oom-pah!" Wozniacki will slip through. Meanwhile, all the grunters on the ATP are safe, of course.I think perhaps we should call it the Allasterator, but Snake-Ear would be good, too.

read more: What should we call it?