As a young child, Drake was a master at crafting excuses.He wouldn't learn his alphabet because... he had a fear of letters. Apparently, they gave him nightmares, especially their horrifying leader- A.He wouldn't pick up his room because... he had a bad back.  He wasn't sure how he had hurt it, but it was pretty bad, and the only thing that made it feel better was laying on the couch drinking juice and watching cartoons.He drew his self-portrait on the wall because... he had run out of paper.  And wasn't it really our fault for not picking more up?And he, most assuredly would not toilet train because... he was afraid of toilet sharks. (and, really, who wouldn't be?)But something occured after he reached the prodigous age of four-- he got lazy.  At this age he decided that every bad thing that happened could be attributed to one source.  His imaginary friend... LITTLE BEAR!Who ate all the watermelon in the fridge?Little Bear.Who knocked baby brother over and made him cry?Little Bear.Who spilled koolaid all over the carpet in the living room?Little Bear.Who's responsible for the delay in the aid response after hurricane Katrina?Little Bear.He seems to quickly disappear after any major incident, so I'm just assuming on that last one.  Drake assures me that his father and I are probably the only people who can't see him, so if you could do us a favor and be on the look-out for this bear:It would be greatly appreciated.  The little furry evil doer makes me miss the toilet sharks.

read more: Little Bear is an evil B@stard.