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Win a Copy of Abraham's Men, the Latest Book in the Birch Harbor Series!!!
Published on 2012-08-26 17:10:00
(Okay this is NOT the actual cover of the book-- we're still working on that, this is just a non-artist's rendering of it?)The votes have been tallyed for choosing the cover of Abraham's Men.
Abraham's Men - Help choose a cover!
Published on 2012-07-26 00:35:00
Help!!
Abraham's Men, Chapter One!
Published on 2012-07-14 00:50:00
Kindergarten Romances and Other News...
Published on 2012-06-11 00:10:00
For those of you who don't know Drake...He's sassy, opinionated and sometimes a bit too worldly for a five-year-old.
Asylum on Nook--limited time only!
Published on 2012-03-08 21:50:00
Yup, I finally got it up over at Barnes and Noble--but here's the deal: Amazon's KDP select program has been really great for me. During the alloted free promo days in December, Asylum was downloaded over 5,000 times. I then went on to sell hundreds of books during December and January, keeping me on the best seller lists for about six weeks. Now I have a feeling that as great as that turned out, a lot of that had to do with the free promo days running right after Christmas, you know what I me [..]
Balloon scare tactics and a free cat to a good home...
Published on 2012-02-27 00:15:00
During the past weekend, I've been on a writing jag. Now please understand that prolifc wordsmithery like this does not often occur for evil scientists preoccupied with world domination. We have a lot on our electromagnetic plates you know. And in the process of writing, I do a lot of researching...okay I confess, a little on-topic internet surfing and a whole lot of following completely unrelated links through wikipedia. Not important--the point is, I'm writing some creepy stuff over here. [..]
Abraham's Men
Published on 2012-01-05 22:05:00
Greetings to my Labrats, Minions, and Asylumites!Well, what can I say? December was a good month for evil scientists...who also write. Thousands upon thousands of copies of Asylum were downloaded during the free promotion around Christmas. If that doesn't start the old word-of-mouth machine, then I'm back to kidnapping and read-by-force tactics..."Oh my sodding glazzies! I can't viddy no more of this strack, oh my brother!"So I've had the question put to me a couple of times lately...when's t [..]
Interview with the Evil Scientist...
Published on 2011-12-12 00:05:00
Well, here it is, my first interview, thanks to Courtnie Dotson for asking important questions that might have otherwise remained unanswered:Where are you from? I was born in Detroit, and lived in a lot of places after that. Currently, I call Grand Rapids home. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?I’m an evil scientist committed to taking over the world. So no, I really can’t. What do you do when you are not writing?Okay, you twisted my arm. I’m a medical scientist th [..]
Birch Harbor Series Giveaway...on like Donkey Kong!
Published on 2011-10-18 22:45:00
I know I shouldn't unveil my top-secret marketing strategies...but trust me this is awesome:KRIS'S (marketing-savy) PLAN TO GET PEOPLE TO BUY ASYLUM!!!Okay, but other than that? Right now, we are running a giveaway. What's the prize? A free copy of Asylum!! And all you have to do is 'like' us on Facebook to enter! In fact, I made it super easy. Look at the sidebar...no, the one to your right...see that? It says: "Please like Asylum on Facebook" Click that, that's all you gotta do, and you a [..]
Asylum--Book One of the Birch Harbor Series--Coming Soon!!!
Published on 2011-10-10 00:25:00
Well all...BIG FREAKING NEWS! Here it comes...wait for it...waaaaaait for it....ASYLUM WILL BE GOING TO PRINT!That's right. Asylum is about to join the growing list at Brother Maynard Publishing. How soon, you ask? How's October 31st? Do you want to see the cover? You know you do! Here it is:I know, I know, freaking awesome isn't it? (thaaaaaanks, Ivy)Anyhow, look for some promotions that will be coming up. The facebook page will be going up soon, and we'll be running a contest, something [..]
Little Bear is an evil B@stard.
Published on 2011-07-31 03:00:00
As a young child, Drake was a master at crafting excuses.He wouldn't learn his alphabet because... he had a fear of letters. Apparently, they gave him nightmares, especially their horrifying leader- A.He wouldn't pick up his room because... he had a bad back. He wasn't sure how he had hurt it, but it was pretty bad, and the only thing that made it feel better was laying on the couch drinking juice and watching cartoons.He drew his self-portrait on the wall because... he had run out of paper. A [..]
Drake offers his first written apology.
Published on 2011-07-21 22:12:00
Well, if you have a 4 year old, you probably already know that one minute spent idly looking in the opposite direction of them can result in thousands of dollars worth of property damage.We got lucky this time. Drake was at a friends house and I guess, somehow managed to throw thirty rocks over a fence and into a neighbor's pool. Which on the bright side does, at last, display a solid work ethic. Finding that many rocks and getting them over a fence in that short of an amount of time IS an acco [..]
The Coolest Trick to Impress Druken Friends at the Bar that the World Has Ever Known!
Published on 2011-07-09 00:15:00
Alright, damnit.Every once in awhile, the pressure to use my amazing amount of awesomeness to do something good for mankind gets to me... and I crack. This does not happen often, so pay attention.I'm about to tell you how to make drunk people think you're the coolest person that they've ever met.Step one-- you have to smoke. Not just because it makes you look cool (face it, even if you're a badass to begin with you look twice as cool smoking a cigarette.)(Case in point)But also because it's ne [..]
Return of the Evil Scientist!
Published on 2011-06-19 23:37:00
What? You all know very well how busy the life of the world's most evil scientist is! My latest bid for WD (world domination, come on, keep up.) has hit a lull, so in the interm, here's something that's been bugging me:OLD PEOPLE.Yup, pretty mu
Sensory Deprivation Tank 'ed'...
Published on 2011-03-21 21:25:00
Yes alright, I know, I know. It's been awhile since I blogged. I have a decent enough excuse - I just started a new job in a new lab, and there's a steep learning curve (aka, I now have duties in addition to pressing the start button on a
WATCH OUT FOR THAT-- oh man, sorry about that particle beam, Anatoli.
Published on 2011-02-25 00:49:00
Anatoli Bugorski-- proving that Russians are so effing hardcore that they will facebutt a particle beam. This is just one of those wierd true things that you want to know about... trust me! In 1978, soviet scientist Anatoli Bugorski wa
Evil is Genetic
Published on 2011-02-13 12:58:00
"Why are you looking at me?? You know, I am really getting sick of the fact that every time a cat gets sacrificed around here, everyone automatically assumes its my fault."Like many mothers, evil or otherwise, I have this unexplainable desire t
Bed, Bath, and Be QUIET AND LET ME SHOP!
Published on 2011-02-05 12:00:00
Being both a female and an evil scientist places me in a very, very minority category of an already minority group. Let's just be honest here, men have really had the market cornered on evil genius for about as long as... well... ever. Ev
The Evil Scientist's Guide to a Relatively Good Marriage
Published on 2011-02-02 19:51:00
"Look, when I said I wanted to spend more time together, I didn't mean that you should move the bed into the lab!"Let's face it--If there's a marriage with a more difficult adjustment period than a muggle-wizard union, it's the joining together of an
The 7.5 strangest mysteries in the field of Evil Science...
Published on 2011-01-25 12:21:00
I am supposing that most of you have wonderful normal jobs. You generally don't have to worry about the daily commute to the nearest hollowed out volcano, or your arch nemesis finding embarrasing pictures of you dressed like a kitten, because your mo
Deadman's Hill
Published on 2011-01-21 02:52:00
Every kid had a Deadman's Hill. If you didn't, you lived somewhere where it didn't snow, or you stayed inside and played Mario Brothers because you had no friends, or worse, no imagination. Deadman's Hill...Yeah, so Nor
The Knocking Neighbor...
Published on 2010-12-30 10:07:00
Getting back to being 'writerly' for just a moment here. The thought occurred to me recently: Why do I waste my time this way? Why write? Yes, of course the simplest answer is because I have to, or I need to, but
New Year's Resolutions
Published on 2010-12-28 05:34:00
New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions. -Mark Twain Well, here we are again, the end of another year. Somethi
Have Yourself an EVIL Little Christmas...
Published on 2010-12-09 02:33:00
What? Like you've never seen a Tesla coil Christmas Tree before???Well, it's that time of year again. World domination tends to hit a slump in the pre-Christmas weeks. Most of us evil scientists have a lot of minions to b
Scientists are lazy
Published on 2010-10-26 11:09:00
"Hey Guys!! Guys!! Come 'ere, look what I invented!!!"- Lord Thaddeus Bong, scientist You doubt me? Tell you what, take yourself on over to google. Do an image search with the keywords 'famous scientists". Now go ahead... brows
Back to 'the Biz'
Published on 2010-10-17 22:18:00
Well, for any of you keeping track, or walking the same query path as me, it's been about a month and a half since I started. I've screwed my courage to the sticking place long enough to send out 8 queries in that
Another Anniversary Down
Published on 2010-10-14 02:11:00
Well, another October 11th come and gone. Last year, I spent our anniversary in the hospital giving birth. At the time, people teased us by saying, "Happy Anniversary, you won't get to spend the day romantically together for another 18 ye
The Preschool Paradox
Published on 2010-09-29 03:55:00
It's only the second week of school, and Drake comes home and proudly announces that he's been given his first 'time-out'! It's hard to get the facts out of him as his accounts of things are sometimes interrupted by random escapades involving t