Blog Feed: Its good to mock

This goes to 11

Published on 2012-05-14 13:43:00

The following is a joke. It's a joke that's not going to be explained. If you get it, it's possibly the funniest thing, you're ever going to laugh at. If you don't get it, don't feel too bad as not every joke is for everyone: > read more

Sorry, are you talking to me?

Published on 2012-05-02 14:45:00

I'm not a big fan of listening to people, preferring not to listen to them. There's no point in talking to me because I'm already bored before you even open your nonsense filled mouth. If you really want to try and convince me about the advantages of becoming a vegetarian, go ahead and try your worse but all that I know is: > read more

I’m a Bon Jovi hating moron with all the charm of a block of demolished apartments that where demolished because the architect had the talent of one of Paris Hilton's dogs.

Published on 2012-05-01 15:41:00

If I was to describe myself, I would say, I'm "brilliant". If you knew me and were to describe me, you would say I'm a "Bon Jovi hating moron with all the charm of a block of demolished apartments that where demolished because the architect had the talent of one of Paris Hilton's dogs". I can sometimes be blunt and tell things the way they are. Some people don't like the truth. Excuse me for a moment, while I tell my son's friend, the way it is: > read more

Natural Flavor With Other Natural Flavor

Published on 2012-04-26 14:50:00

Some words sometimes say what we want them to say and some words say some things that say nothing about sense at all. Maybe it's laziness, maybe it's a stroke of marketing genius or maybe it's a combination of both but the natural flavors of this vanilla creme bar are definitely natural: > read more

Management Positions Available

Published on 2012-04-25 16:25:00

Scurvy Jane decided that she was going to decide to do it. She had thought about applying for the position for one week and three weeks and 2 days. It was a management position that included vacation, uniforms and meals. The only thing she was hesitant about was the salary: > read more

Thirsty Dave and the Drunks with Guns

Published on 2012-04-22 06:04:00

I'm not saying Thirsty Dave is anti-social but just because I'm not saying it, doesn't mean it's not true. > read more

Becky Grimmer–Single

Published on 2012-04-16 13:56:00

Thirsty Dave has never been single. The thirsty one and beer go hand in hand like beer and a beer drinkers hand on beer. He looked at the face of Becky Grimmer on the television screen and realized there and then that he loved this woman but he just could not figure out why this heavenly angel was single: > read more

************tHe cUlt Of boN jOvI***********

Published on 2012-04-02 14:04:00

Have I been busy? You can bet your 'Understanding Magnets for Dummies' book that I've been busy. Can I tell you what I've been doing? Not exactly. If Bon Jovi know that I'm on to them, my life could turn into an episode of 'Bon Jovi fans stalk Bill Y - Series 1'. This is big, boys and girls. This is VERY BIG. The following picture is just one of many that contain conclusive proof that Bon Jovi have been brainwashing kids who have been brainwashing children into becoming Bon Jovi fans of the futu [..] > read more

This book may save your life

Published on 2012-03-25 10:13:00

Many books promise many great things but they rarely deliver. If you're going to read only one book, make sure you read this one because it may save your life: > read more

Thirsty Dave sticks two fingers up at the man

Published on 2012-03-21 15:40:00

Some people have a sole purpose in life. That purpose; to stick two fingers up at the man and get in the face of authority from daylight to the opposite of daylight. Thirsty Dave is one such man. As soon as he came across the 'warning, man opening umbrella' sign, there was only ever one thing he was going to do: > read more

If you don’t like lies, please look away now.

Published on 2012-03-19 14:49:00

There's no need for lies. I can handle anything that is thrown at me but not lies. I just don't see the point in not telling the truth. When my first girlfriend played Bon Jovi for me and asked me if I thought it was the best music I had ever heard, did I lie to her? No I didn't. I told her there was no possible way, I could go out with somebody who classified the sound of a depressed, bagpipe playing cat, overdosing on tuna, as anything even resembling music. I just don't see the point in lying [..] > read more

Shirley is nervous

Published on 2012-03-18 14:38:00

Little Dill Y is now 7 years of age and learns about Consequentialism, Hypervitaminosis and Eptorhinoplasty from his mother. It's left to me to tell him about the procedures for downloading fart apps. Unlike me, his vocabulary contains more than 50 words. This is because school encourages him to be creative with words: > read more

It’s good to mock–The place where you learn more than one thing

Published on 2012-03-17 14:15:00

Never let it be said that It's good to mock doesn't educate and make the world a better place. Today we tell you not 1 but 2 things you don't know about. Feast your eyes on how to resuscitate a drowning cat and also learn what 'centrifugal' means: > read more

Spot the difference, if you can

Published on 2012-03-16 16:13:00

This one will probably mess with your mind in more ways than one. The following pictures look alike but on close inspection, they're actually different. Take as much time as you need and see if you can spot the subtle difference between the two: > read more

The polar opposite views of the parents we are

Published on 2012-03-15 14:25:00

Jill Y and I have very different idea of what it is to be good parents. I want the little dude to grow up with friends and to stop being such an arrogant, know it all. Jill Y wants him to grow up knowing it all and to point out the mistakes of the ordinary folk: > read more

Modern technology is a great learning tool

Published on 2012-03-14 15:03:00

They tell you that school days are the best days of your life but you never listen to them. When I was in school, we learned with the aid of hieroglyphics and wood. Modern technology is a wonderful thing and the kids these days, learn form books with pictures and words: > read more

10% Satisfaction Guaranteed

Published on 2012-03-13 13:26:00

Thirsty Dave has had 56,992 different jobs. It’s not that he's a bad worker but he’s been the worst worker at the worst worker convention for the past 36 years. Last night he gave up selling square footballs and began selling herbal products. I have a feeling this one won't last too long because he hasn't really grasped how advertising works: > read more

Dolls to love and cherish

Published on 2012-03-12 15:01:00

Jill Y is a doll collector. I know, I didn't think grown ups collected them either but they do. She recently decided to stop buying shoes even though she only had 567, 998 pairs. Collecting dolls makes her happy and that in turn makes me happy. I collect reasons to hate Bon Jovi and she doesn't interfere with my hobby at all. Yesterday, it was 7 days since she bought shoes so I decided to get her a doll to love and cherish: > read more

Let the robots battle instead

Published on 2012-03-11 09:55:00

My entire belief system centres on removing Bon Jovi from the realm of consciousness and being accepted at brilliant. This is also the signature I use at the bottom of emails and cheques. Not a religious fan by any means, if it was up to me, I'd put an end to the many wars caused by religious beliefs and let the robots battle instead: > read more

Nothing but lies

Published on 2012-03-10 14:09:00

Yesterday I was a happy-go-lucky son of a mother and father. Today I am a happy-go-lucky animal who has had his innocence taken away. I believed what I was told, in good faith and never even thought of asking for reassurance. If this world is to be a place where lies like this live, I can’t say I’m going to enjoy it: > read more

There’s money in shoes

Published on 2012-03-09 14:52:00

I really should have seen this one coming. In times of recession, times are tough and sacrifices have to be made. Thirsty Dave has cut back on the beer and now only drinks when he's awake. Little Dill Y has dropped his pilot lessons and will start them again next year when he's 7. I've had to reduce the amount of Bon Jovi hatred posters I get printed each week. I don't know how I'm going to teach the world without those posters but times are tough. Jill Y has made the biggest sacrifice by cuttin [..] > read more

All hail the Artist

Published on 2012-03-08 14:45:00

Little Dill Y is very much into abstract art at the moment with his chosen tool being paint. I remember the first time we realized he had talent because it caused a degree of pain, not felt since Jill Y gave birth to him: > read more

Evolution gone mad

Published on 2012-03-07 15:27:00

Barbie has changed and I don't know if I like it at all. When I was a little boy, Barbie was your average career girl with a passion for trying to figure out how magnets work. I understand that things change and that Barbie has evolved over time but when did she become a roast chicken: > read more

I have 675, 876 reasons to dislike Bon Jovi

Published on 2012-03-06 14:28:00

Jill Y has the same amount of shoes as I have reasons to dislike Bon Jovi and I have 675, 876 reasons to dislike that pitiful excuse for a band. If you were to ask me how I know how many pairs of shoes she has, I might lie and say that I guessed. If I was to be honest, I might tell you that I hacked into her ‘shoe database’. It wasn’t an easy thing to do because she has some pretty unusual security measures but I found a way in: > read more

Scurvy Jane and the horse cock

Published on 2012-03-04 14:10:00

When Scurvy Jane told us that she was with a guy who had a cock, the size of a horse, we laughed until we stopped. Then she produced the picture to sort of back up her claim: > read more

The teaching of Little Dill Y

Published on 2012-03-03 15:34:00

Little Dill Y is one smart cookie but he doesn't take to well to subtlety. Jill Y and I have learned that it's best to be direct when we're teaching him about morals, ethics and Bon Jovi hatred. He understands the perils of racism, fascism and now, sexism: > read more

Racist Recycle Bin

Published on 2012-03-02 15:45:00

I don't know what I work at so explaining it to little Dill Y was never going to be easy. Lucky enough, we recently had a 'bring your budding genius son or daughter to work’ day. As soon as we got to the office, I just knew it was going to be a tough day. It took him about 3 minutes to label the recycle bin: > read more

Are we that desperate that blind dentists are being recruited?

Published on 2012-03-01 16:13:00

There are three types of people, those who are not afraid to ask the tough questions and those that are students. If I could choose to go back to any time in history, I would choose the year of 2005 for it was the year 2005, when David Wine, Southend-on-Sea, Essex, asked the most important question ever, on the subject of dentistry: > read more

Free ride in a police car

Published on 2012-02-29 15:19:00

If I even catch one of you laughing at this, I'll come right over and wipe the smile off your face. I was shopping with little Dill Y who is a 6 year old budding genius. We had just left one of the shops when the shop owner followed us outside and asked the little guy to put back the Bon Jovi CD that he didn't pay for. He turned to the shop owner and told him that nobody in their right mind would pay for Bon Jovi music. I don’t think I’ve ever been such a proud parent as I was at that moment [..] > read more

Thirsty Dave killed 343 kittens in a week

Published on 2012-02-28 14:12:00

Thirsty Dave went to Russia for a week. By the time he got home, he had killed 343 kittens. In the beginning, we didn't find this funny at all. He explained that Soviet Russia was different to anywhere he had ever been. When he showed us this poster, we realised exactly what he meant: > read more

The single greatest thing ever created

Published on 2012-02-27 14:38:00

With all the information that’s constantly thrown at us, it's not hard to become massively confused. This is the excuse I like to use to cover up my mass stupidity and it's a good excuse too. Sugartastic Daddy John's business partner, Akiva, is a simple man who likes to get straight to the point. I may be overreacting here but I think his latest ad for a sofa is possibly the single greatest thing ever created: > read more

In years to come, I will publish this post again and again and again and then in 3D

Published on 2012-02-26 14:11:00

I have a dream. I have a dream where George Lucas finally stops releasing different versions of the same Star Wars films. In the dream he initially refuses but I eventually find a way to stop him: > read more

No smoke without fire

Published on 2012-02-25 13:48:00

As a man and someone who has never been a woman, my knowledge of the female mind is limited to say the least. There is a school of thought that believe that the inner workings of the female mind can be explained in a short 75 year lesson but I don't have time for that right now. I do know that watching your partner giving birth is one of life's most affirming experiences. All the doubts and worries disappear as you marvel at the little miracle before you. Here we look back on the worries of som [..] > read more

Call it what you want but today, there is no mocking

Published on 2012-02-24 16:02:00

It’s good to mock but every once in a blue moon, it’s good to step back, put things into perspective and applaud: > read more

The consequences of too much alcohol

Published on 2012-02-23 15:09:00

Sometimes when two bunny rabbits like each other and have a few beers, they might loosen up, go back to their hutch and forget about using rabbit protection. At least that's what I told Little Dill Y when he asked about this sign: > read more

Santos The Great

Published on 2012-02-22 14:21:00

Some people do things and tell others about it. Some people like the attention this brings. Some people do things and prefer to keep it to themselves, disliking the attention it brings. Some people do things and are caught between the rock and a hard place of telling others about it and keeping it to themselves out of fear of embarrassment. Santos Paxton could easily be one of these people but he's not and we applaud him greatly for it: > read more

Ultra Thirsty Dave

Published on 2012-02-21 14:37:00

If I hadn't of seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it. Now that I've seen it, I still don't think I believe it. When Thirsty Dave told us that he was ordering beer from the barman, before he was born, we laughed because we thought it was a joke. The laughter stopped when he showed us an ultra scan of his little self, ordering two cold ones: > read more

My brother and Jill Y’s sister will not be winning Couple of The Year, this year or any other.

Published on 2012-02-20 13:52:00

I'm not usually good at these things but something tells me that my brother and Jill Y's sister will never be an item. The first time they met each other, there was a definite lack of chemistry: > read more

In case of fire, please get your priorities right

Published on 2012-02-19 08:17:00

Jill Y spends more time tweeting than Thirsty Dave spends in the pub and Thirsty Dave lives in a pub. Through a series of remarkable coincidences, there has been a fire in the last three pubs that Jill Y has been in. As soon as the fire starts, she is tweeting about it and sharing the news with the world. We're due to visit Thirsty Dave's pub later on and he has decided to leave nothing to chance and make a pre-emptive strike: > read more

How to take the last doughnut

Published on 2012-02-18 06:50:00

I remember Friday, January 13 as if it was the 13th day of the year for that was the day I consumed a piece of knowledge so earth shatteringly brilliant that I will never be the same again until I am: > read more

Please just make it go away

Published on 2012-02-17 16:46:00

I don’t know what this means. I don’t care what it mans. I just want it to go away so here, you have it. All I know is that I’m better off with it. Do with it, whatever you want just make it go: > read more

Perfectly Open Space

Published on 2012-02-16 15:53:00

Sometimes the obvious is so obvious that you can get carried away with what you’re doing and fail to see it: > read more

Time to be late

Published on 2012-02-15 15:37:00

The sequence of events are in sequence. I told Jill Y that I've never been late for anything. She didn't believe me. I again told her that I've never been late for anything in my life and she said that within one day, she could change everything and make me late for my Bon Jovi hatred meeting. I laughed at her and told her that even though I had many faults, timekeeping was not one of them. I went to the Paris Hilton appreciation meeting and when I got home Jill Y had a cheeky grin on her cheeky [..] > read more

We waited 30 min and no service

Published on 2012-02-14 16:10:00

Thirsty Dave and I were thirsty and hungry. We decided to go and get a burger and a beer. It seemed like we were waiting hours to get served but it turned out it was only 30 minutes. I know this because we left them a message as we left: > read more

Thirsty Dave somehow shies away from the attention

Published on 2012-02-13 15:16:00

Thirsty Dave was the 1,000000th customer in the shop and won a bottle of champagne and many other bottles of other stuff too. In the normal course of events, he would be over the moon but he just wasn't himself. For some reason, he didn't seem to be enjoying all the attention he was getting: > read more

Pregnant Joan Debusey has an orange baby.

Published on 2012-02-12 12:31:00

Pregnant Joan Debusey was pregnant. In 1998, she developed a sense of humour, equal in parts to the sense of humour of someone who's really funny. When we heard she was going into labour, we jumped in the car to head to the hospital. Halfway through our journey, Thirsty Dave got a text, telling us that Pregnant Joan had an orange baby. We thought that orange was an unusual colour but it all made sense when we got to the hospital. > read more

Thirsty Dave is a man who knows how to use words

Published on 2012-02-11 14:58:00

Thirsty Dave has only gone and done it again. Every now and sometimes, he takes care of one of Sugartastic Daddy John's shops. He decides to sell stuff at a discount and advertises in his own wordy way: > read more

Passport Application

Published on 2012-02-10 17:08:00

Vincenzo lost his passport and applied for a new one. He went through the appropriate procedure but for some strange reason, there was some problem with his passport pictures: > read more

Gorilla playing saxophone with balloons at your party

Published on 2012-02-09 15:26:00

Sometimes you can't see what you're looking for because you're not looking for it. Little Dill Y nearly figured out how magnets work so we decided to throw him a party. All he wanted was a gorilla, playing saxophone with balloons. I know he's 6 and thinks that his dad can do anything but there was no way we could get him what he wanted so I decided to head out to get him a stripper. Who would have guessed, that around the corner from It's good to mock HQ, was the very answer to the little guys d [..] > read more

The Unknown Man

Published on 2012-02-08 14:04:00

Sugartastic Daddy John's great, great grandfather was known as the 'unknown man' because everything was known about him. He lived in happier times when there was no Bon Jovi, no Star Wars prequels and no Justin Bieber. According to legend, he was a legend. The unknown man had a fondness for library paste and he died as he lived, eating the stuff: > read more

Chad the grad’s mum and dad were so glad, they took out an ad

Published on 2011-07-05 14:22:00

This is the not very inspirational story of Chad, a not so smart lad. If brains were taxed, he’d get a refund. His antenna does not pick up all the channels. He has verbal diarrhea and mental constipation. If brains were gas, he wouldn’t have eno > read more

My face would have fell off if it wasn’t stuck on with glue said the man whose face was stuck on with glue

Published on 2011-07-04 14:54:00

If there’s one thing that really bothers us at IGTM, it’s not understanding how magnets work, not understanding Maths and not understanding how Jill Y needs 17,000 pairs of shoes when she only has two feet. Thirsty Dave recently went through one > read more

Scurvy Jane’s new boyfriend might not be boyfriend material

Published on 2011-07-03 10:56:00

When Sugartastic Daddy John told Scurvy Jane that she had the sense of humour of a kitchen utensil, she thought he was being sarcastic. He wasn't. Some kitchen utensils are really funny but that's not really common knowledge so she wasn't to know. Ma > read more

The remarkable story of someone who got what she wanted by overcoming all obstacles

Published on 2011-07-02 14:47:00

I only know one person who is smart, has no fear of nuns and understands how magnets work. I don't actually know her name but she's Jill Y's sister. A woman of almost 'other world' qualities, she actually understands teenagers so she more than likely > read more

Heed our warning or don’t

Published on 2011-07-01 16:05:00

Despite what you may think you think, Bon Jovi fans are the reason for the global financial crisis, global warming and the global adulation of Bon Jovi. One day I’ll explain why, but not today. Today was going to be about trying to figure out how m > read more

Son, we salute you

Published on 2011-06-30 08:13:00

We don’t care what the school says, we know Little Dill Y is a good kid. He may have sold the correct answers to the test to the entire class but he’s 5 years of age and we call that entrepreneurism. He may have taken that DJ hostage but that’s > read more

Fathom this if you can - and your reward is a slice of squid pie

Published on 2011-06-29 14:40:00

Of the many, many things we don't understand at It's good to mock HQ, how magnets work, clowns and hula hoops cause us to lose the most sleep. We've come to realise that some things are just not meant to be understood and have slowly but surely, come > read more

Their favourite band was Matchbox Twenty

Published on 2011-06-28 14:26:00

If you've come here looking for an amusing story, please go away. If you've come here looking to hear how much we detest Bon Jovi, please go away and come back tomorrow. If you've come here looking for the story of a couple who met over a crowded roo > read more

Getting to know your audience

Published on 2011-06-27 14:00:00

It's important that we know who's been visiting It's good to mock. If we know our audience, we know who we’re annoying and if we know who we’re annoying, we sleep like a baby in a topless bar. Lately, there's been a lot of cows dropping by and we > read more

Happy Hannah Huston

Published on 2011-06-26 11:21:00

Every once in a while an artist is inspired to create perfection. Today, that artist just happens to be me and that just makes it all the sweeter. Ever since I took those pictures of Jill Y that I'm not allowed to speak of, I've realised that the cam > read more

Beware of the sign

Published on 2011-06-25 08:12:00

Dog - man’s best friend or animal to be aware of? The question is as old as a rock that’s 4,800,000,000 years old. If you’ve ever been bitten by a dog, you more than likely wouldn’t have enjoyed it. Your natural instinct might be to bit > read more

Excuse me but there’s just no excuse for this type of behaviour

Published on 2011-06-24 15:53:00

Pictures and words go together like love and marriage and divorce and marriage. What you are about to see is not a picture with words but words within a picture. When you see this, you’re probably going to think that there’s something inherently > read more

One moment you’re discussing Nun worshipping Paris Hilton fans with your son when all of a sudden, out of the blue, you find God

Published on 2011-06-23 15:47:00

I'm not a spiritual person but I do have faith. I have faith that one day the music of Bon Jovi will stop and hopefully this will happen in my next 5 lifetimes. So there I was, minding my own business, teaching little Dill Y how to tear pages from th > read more

If you ever want to judge a book by the cover, this is the time to do it

Published on 2011-06-22 15:30:00

There are people in this world who are quiet, unassuming, gentle natured souls. Then there's Scurvy Jane. The scurvy one is just your regular, one in a 6,775,235,700, vitamin deficient lady who's not afraid to say what she wants, when she wants and s > read more

Back Seat Driver

Published on 2011-06-21 15:01:00

Thirsty Dave laughed as if he heard something funny. What he heard was anything but funny for what he heard was the so called music of Bon Jovi. At the same time, Sugartastic Daddy John was starting his new job. When I asked him why he was dressing u > read more

Thirsty Dave displays a remarkable display of strength

Published on 2011-06-20 15:15:00

Thirty Dave is one of the nicest guys you could ever meet, as long as you don’t take his drink away from him. The last person who tried to separate the man from his beer was his old teacher Mr Hardiman, RIP. Some people have a sense of humour that > read more

Hardly Handsome Harvey could hardly move his hands

Published on 2011-06-19 13:50:00

When Hardly Handsome Harvey, woke up that afternoon, he just knew it wasn't going to be a good day even though things had been going quite well for him. He had just got a promotion from having no job to having a job. He had just finished co-writing > read more

Massively confused man is massively confused

Published on 2011-06-18 16:46:00

When it comes to being right about stuff, we’re generally 98% wrong, 1% half right and 2% massively confused. Yes, we’re mathematically challenged at It’s good to mock and that’s just the way it is. When I was supposed to be growing up, I was > read more

I didn't just wake up one night and decide to be brilliant. In my previous life, I was Albert Einstein's abacus

Published on 2011-06-17 16:45:00

Even the brilliant sometimes have doubts. We sometimes wonder if we’re bringing up Little Dill Y properly. Because he’s a 5 year old genius, we teach him about the important things in life like quantum physics, climate change and Bon Jovi hatred. > read more

Tell me not to do something and I will not, not do it.

Published on 2011-06-16 13:29:00

Hindsight is as valuable as knowing what’s going to happen before it happens and looking back now, the signs were there for all to see. Sometimes we fail to see the very things that are right in front of us. One small action, one single movement, s > read more

Sugartastic Daddy John was up the creek without a paddle or a canoe but some creative thinking soon saved the day

Published on 2011-06-15 15:27:00

Until someone invents a device consisting of a circular canopy of cloth on a folding metal frame supported by a central rod, for protection against rain, I'll continue to get wet when it rains. It's written in the scriptures that he/she/he-she who mo > read more

Jill Y doesn’t believe a word out of my mouth. Well, I hope she’s hungry because when she sees this, she’s going to have to eat those words.

Published on 2011-06-14 15:12:00

It’s good to see my parents happy. They just received an email from a man who told them they won $35 million in the lottery. How lucky can two people be? And to think, they didn’t even enter the lottery and they still won. They just need to send > read more

Thirsty Dave and his acquaintances use words unknown to the sober

Published on 2011-06-13 14:46:00

When Thirsty Dave is non sober, he speaks a language known only to himself and his non sober acquaintances. To the rest of us looking in, it's like walking in half way through Inception after listening to The Dark Side of the Moon backwards while wat > read more

A brief history of Scurvy Jane

Published on 2011-06-12 11:58:00

The internet is full of things that people want to know about like the Bermuda Triangle, the 24 hour Le Mans race and how magnets work but what about the stuff you don’t want to know about? Where can you find information about synchronized eating, > read more

The tarnished reputation of Thirsty Dave

Published on 2011-06-11 14:05:00

When people look for a word to describe Thirsty Dave, the one word that pops up more than any other is 'cheap'. I personally think that's a little unfair. Sure, the thirsty one has never bought a round of drinks for anyone other than his own split pe > read more

Little Dill Y isn’t buying what you’re selling, unless you’re selling cookies.

Published on 2011-06-10 17:22:00

For as long as I’ve been brilliant, I’ve been very brilliant. It’s a burden I have to live with and live with it I do. Lately, there’s been a lot of people knocking at the door, selling everything from the supposed antidote to Bon Jovi to the > read more

I’ve changed with the times

Published on 2011-06-09 15:39:00

When I was younger, I wasn't as old as I am now. Things were simpler back then and for some reason I was always punctual. Back then, my favourite saying was “he'd be late for his own funeral”. These days my favourite saying is "I hate Bon Jovi". > read more

My experience with the human brain–A cautionary tale

Published on 2011-06-08 14:46:00

I have issues. I have serious issues. I have serious issues with the human brain. If you think for one moment that you can trust the human brain, I have news for you - you can't. I used to be like you, all trusting and understanding but I soon learne > read more

The sad tale of how Noisy Nancy Nugent became Noiseless Nancy Nugent.

Published on 2011-06-07 15:30:00

Jill Y's neighbour's, Nephew's, Niece, Noisy Nancy Nugent, used to be really happy until she stopped and by stopped, I mean died and by died, I mean ceased to exist and when I say she ceased to exist, I mean she was no longer on this plane of existen > read more

If you don’t laugh at life, it will kick you in the head and that kick really hurts

Published on 2011-06-06 12:53:00

Don't ever let anyone tell you that man eating sharks are not dangerous. Other dangerous things that you might not be aware of include shopping in places that are not online - too easy to get lost in the shop and online dating - Svetlana the 21 year > read more

There’s confusion, mass confusion and then there’s me

Published on 2011-06-05 15:09:00

"Religion is the opium of the people" are famous words associated with Karl Marx. Jill Y asked me what I thought. I told her that I thought Bon Jovi were the worst band ever, that nobody will ever figure out how magnets work and that maths is more co > read more

A sheep in sheep's clothing

Published on 2011-06-04 17:06:00

If you've ever wanted to know if you're really as bad at everything as you think you are, try asking yourself this question: Am I really as bad at everything as I think I am? If you answer ‘Yes’, you are and if you answer ‘No’, you’re not. > read more

I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth but I was born with an ‘I hate Bon Jovi’ t-shirt

Published on 2011-06-03 17:26:00

If there’s three things Jill Y likes, its sleeping, walking, sleepwalking and dreaming while sleepwalking. If there’s three things I like, it’s ‘I hate Bon Jovi’ t-shirts, tea, anagrams of the word ‘eat’ that rhyme with ‘pea’ and te > read more

WARNING: Listening to Bon Jovi may cause irreversible damage

Published on 2011-06-02 14:47:00

She who has read my previous work 'how to hate Bon Jovi in 345,676 ways' is eager read my latest work 'living with the pressure of a world that doesn't hate Bon Jovi Pt. 57'. When you're me, it's hard finding like minded individuals who share the lac > read more

Scurvy Jane is one vitamin C deficient lady who is not afraid to tell you that your ugly baby is ugly

Published on 2011-06-01 15:51:00

Sugartastic Daddy John is the one who puts us in our place when we step out of line. Thirsty Dave's brother and his girlfriend had a new baby the other day and we went to visit the new-born child in hospital. Scurvy Jane's tongue always speaks before > read more

I have a rare disease that will kill me if I accidently hear the so called music of Bon Jovi

Published on 2011-05-31 14:49:00

Jill Y and I are not married but that doesn't mean we don't love each other. It doesn't mean we do love each either but we can definitely, sometimes be in the same room together and sometimes for up to 2 hours at a time. I recently had a nightmare wh > read more

A reading from the book of girls

Published on 2011-05-30 16:09:00

Today's work of art is being composed from the doghouse and on reflection, Jill Y was probably right to send me here. Little Dill Y came in from school and was upset because he had a disagreement with Nikki Butt, a girl in his class. He and Nikki had > read more

Sacrifice or continue to suffer

Published on 2011-05-29 14:04:00

People who don't listen to me, don't hear me. Because of this, we are forced to face the wrath of Icelandic volcanoes. I didn't just wake up one night and decide to be brilliant. I've evolved over time into a Mocker par excellence and people should r > read more

You can teach a dog new tricks but that doesn’t mean that they can then just decide to go and lease an apartment

Published on 2011-05-28 17:11:00

Jill Y doesn’t like to waste time. When we were teaching Little Dill Y how to talk, we also taught Alsa how to talk. Alsa is Jill Y’s dog and in the beginning, she sounded a little rough but before you could say “ Mr. See owned a saw and Mr. So > read more

Thrifty Scurvy Jane

Published on 2011-05-27 13:42:00

Scurvy Jane is a fan of free things. It doesn’t really natter what it is, if it’s free, she’ll take it and say thanks. Not too long ago, she faced a choice – borrow 300k from the bank to buy a new place to live or remain living in her own ima > read more

It’s good to mock - answering the questions you don’t ask

Published on 2011-05-26 16:03:00

Today a young lady stopped me and asked if I knew where “the car shop” was. �There’s a few things you should know about the collective at It’s good to mock. We crave situations which allow us to talk nonsense, we’re incapable of giving > read more

It’s good to mock – helping you make your own decision by doing what we tell you

Published on 2011-05-25 16:34:00

We rarely mind our own business at It's good to mock because minding your own business is boring. Armed with this philosophy, Jill Y and I have been carefully influencing Little Dill Y’s musical taste. It’s important to us that he makes up his ow > read more

Mac v PC – There’s only one winner and that winner is Little Dill Y

Published on 2011-05-24 15:51:00

As long as Little Dill Y expresses himself in a creative way, his mother and I will continue be happy. He’s 5 now and the other day he came and told us he wanted a Mac. He gave us many of the reasons why a Mac is better than a PC. When those 6 hour > read more

Television News–It’s like the news but on television

Published on 2011-05-23 15:30:00

Thank gods for the news and thank gods for television news. Believe it or not, even the current affair junkies at It’s good to mock, can’t always be aware of global happenings. It’s at times like this that we turn to television news and our fav > read more

Protecting our son’s interests is what we’re all about

Published on 2011-05-22 13:07:00

We haven’t had to go out and buy condoms for a while. That’s because our 5 year old gets them for us. Little Dill Y enjoys the mass attention he gets from Jill Y and I and isn’t too keen on anybody stealing his thunder. I don’t quite know how > read more

Extracting the fact from fiction

Published on 2011-05-21 17:18:00

It doesn’t take a genius like me to state that the state of the economy is bleak to say the very least. With this internet thing, it’s possible to access facts and figures which leave us in little doubt as to just how bad things are. The problem > read more

Music soothes the savage little brat

Published on 2011-05-20 16:21:00

When Little Dill Y was littler, he somehow got it into his massively confused head, that he could be bold whenever the mood hit him. For a while we allowed him to live with the delusion but Jill Y soon got bored and decided it was time he learned to > read more

Impossible? With us, there is no impossible

Published on 2011-05-19 15:21:00

They said it couldn’t be done but they were so, so wrong. It’s highly doubtful that God exists but if he/she does and he/she loves a trier, then he/she must love us to the max. In our humble opinion, what we’re after achieving is even big > read more

Bringing up (dog) baby

Published on 2011-05-18 15:43:00

Thirsty Dave has ben asking a lot of questions lately. He usually only has one question and it’s usually directed at the barman. He’s taken a keen interest in parenting even though he has no kids. He especially wanted to know how our son, Little > read more

Sometimes you can focus too much

Published on 2011-05-17 14:29:00

When it comes to alcohol based beverages, Thirsty Dave is a connoisseur. He can tell you the amount of alcohol in a drink, simply by reading the information on the bottle or can. His brain is a large database of useful and useless facts relating to h > read more

Never trust Thirsty Dave with anything that involves anything

Published on 2011-05-16 14:58:00

Nobody knows how or why it happens but once or twice a year, Thirsty Dave miraculously becomes sober. I personally think it has something to do with having no alcohol in his veins but that’s just an uneducated guess. If you happen to meet him durin > read more

That dreaded moment when the Student becomes the Master who sarcastically puts you in your place

Published on 2011-05-15 12:49:00

There are defining moments in a father/son relationship – the first time you sit down to talk about the mechanics and good consequences of intercourse through reference to easily observed natural events, the first time he comes home and tells you w > read more

I need to take a picture of my boss, the next time I ask for a rise

Published on 2011-05-14 14:58:00

Jill Y has always loved animals. Her favourites are cats, dogs and fish and her least favourites are Politicians, racists and Bon Jovi fans. As a Scientist, she gets to work on some secret experiments. She sometimes brings her work home with her and > read more

Sugartastic Daddy John is rarely in fowl humour

Published on 2011-05-13 12:30:00

There’s just no talking to some people. Sugartastic Daddy John changes his mind more often than he changes his wives. The last time we checked, he was on wife no. 38 but that was last week and we’d be surprised if that number hasn’t increased b > read more

A rainy day in our world of little

Published on 2011-05-11 14:05:00

We don’t have any money. We’re broke. We’re as broke as as a joke that has no money and will be paying back the bank for its next 4 lifetimes. It wasn’t long ago that we could afford things like hope and dreams but that was then and this is n > read more

1 horsepower = 745.699872 watts but I haven’t a clue what that actually means

Published on 2011-05-10 15:31:00

I’ll just come clean and admit it – despite what you might think, I’m not great at everything. Sure, I’m great at most things but Math’s, how magnets work and fixing cars are just way over my head and I just knew that one day, this would co > read more

Sugartastic Daddy John - Entrepreneur, par excellence

Published on 2011-05-09 13:47:00

Never let it be said that Sugartastic Daddy John is not an outstanding entrepreneur, par excellence. Such a legend is the man that he has franchised his latest money making idea out to his friends and so far it seems to be working a treat. When he sa > read more

When you get ahead…

Published on 2011-05-08 12:34:00

I knew I’d lost my sense of humour when Jill Y said to me “you’ve lost your sense of humour”. It was at that precise moment that I knew I had to get it back at all costs. It turned out that it didn’t take long to get it back and > read more

The day my parents realised Bon Jovi could no longer poison my nervous system

Published on 2011-05-07 15:42:00

Some things are unavoidable. When I was a little mocker, I would misbehave to the max so my parents came up with a unique way of punishing me. They knew the sound of Bon Jovi would cause me to be violently ill so they would force me to listen to Jon > read more

Thirsty Dave doesn’t do cheap costumes

Published on 2011-05-06 17:17:00

Some people court controversy with minimal ease. Thirsty Dave is one such person. To fully understand this unique individual, you need to know a little background information. He was born in a brewery and is said to give off an aroma of barley and ye > read more

When two worlds collide

Published on 2011-05-05 13:04:00

Jill Y is a (mad) Scientist and as such, knows a lot about the single most mystifying thing in life – Math’s. Thirsty Dave is a man who likes beer and the more he consumes, the happier he becomes. For a long time now Jill Y has being doing h > read more

Last night I dreamt, I wrote ‘567,998 reasons to hate Bon Jovi Pt.5’

Published on 2011-05-04 15:20:00

Did you ever read a book that was so engrossing that the words leapt off the page? Why do I ask, you ask? The reason I pose this question is that last night, I dreamt I wrote ‘567,998 reasons to hate Bon Jovi Pt.5’. It was such an engrossing book > read more

I said “No bitch, go home”

Published on 2011-05-03 13:49:00

I went for a walk last night. Jill Y was trying to teach me Math’s and it got totally out of hand. I understand basic economics – I get paid and Jill Y takes the money and turns it into shoes. That part is alright but it’s the whole: x2 + > read more

Opposites attract

Published on 2011-05-02 13:52:00

Clichés make as much sense as giving KFC gift certificates to members of PETA. Opposites attract and it’s just as well because the collective at It’s good to mock are as opposite as chalk and cheese. Some of us believe what can be proven by scie > read more

If you tell me not to do something, chances are I’m going to go ahead and do it straight away for this is the way of the child

Published on 2011-05-01 12:31:00

We went to visit Jill Y’s grandfather. The visit didn’t last too long and I’m told it was all my fault. A mocker like me, tends to say things to people off the cuff. If you haven’t an open minded sense of humour with a deep rooted hatred of B > read more

You’ve got to hand it to the doctor, he sure knows his stuff.

Published on 2011-04-30 15:15:00

It doesn’t take a genius like me to state that the state of the economy is at the very least bleak. Those who are lucky enough to have a job are not making a lot of money, find it hard to make ends meet and those who don’t have a job, find it har > read more

This is the creative genius who invented Mario

Published on 2011-04-29 17:07:00

I've never 'got' video games. I'm told that the latest games are very lifelike and that killing someone in a game is only second best to killing someone in the so called real world. Strangely enough, this is an experience I can live without. I've a l > read more

This makes about as much sense as two old bald men fighting over an electric pencil sharpener in a lighthouse during a windstorm.

Published on 2011-04-28 15:16:00

Sometimes this stuff seems to write itself. If Thirsty Dave sees a pub, off-licence or even a picture of beer, it’s reasonable to assume that he’s going to want a beer. If you or any of your friends attempt to force religion down my throat, it’ > read more

Warren ‘word-lover’ Randall is a uniquely talented individual

Published on 2011-04-27 14:29:00

Jill Y’s only talent is that she can mimic people. One time she mimicked the sound of me getting sick and I thought I was listening to Bon Jovi. Because I thought I was listening to Bon Jovi, I got sick and a whole vicious circle was born. Sugartas > read more

How to make your 5 year old bitter and twisted

Published on 2011-04-26 14:23:00

We realise that there’s a certain school of thought out there who might not agree with everything we say and do at It’s good to mock. If we cared what you thought, we might occasionally do things differently but we don’t, so we won’t. We > read more

God hates fags

Published on 2011-04-25 10:33:00

Little Dill Y is an open minded 5 year old. He goes to a multi - denominational genius school and has been brought up to like or dislike people depending on whether they listen to Bon Jovi or not. He’s plenty of friends from different races and rel > read more

Thirsty Dave accepts a new job

Published on 2011-04-24 10:48:00

Thirsty Dave is a relationship expert and is always open to helping his fellow man when there’s a cash incentive involved. His relationships with beer, wine and spirits are legendary and that’s why he’s always in demand. Recently he was approac > read more

That single moment when you realise the truth

Published on 2011-04-23 04:08:00

Allow us to aploogise in advance because there is nothing funny about this story at all. If you’ve come here looking for amusement, please divert your eyes right now. Little Willy Waldron was like all kids and had dreams, ambitions and aspirations > read more

Funkalicious Fashion for the 9 foot tall fashionista in your family

Published on 2011-04-22 07:18:00

It was bound to happen sooner or later. Sugartastic Daddy John is a stylish mofo of the highest calibre. When he struts down the street, the Bee Gees suddenly appear and play ‘Staying Alive’ to his every groove. Some say he should be a singer in > read more

The O Game and Clever Math's

Published on 2011-04-21 00:42:00

If I had a cent for every bad band in the world, I would have a grand total of one cent. That’s because there is only one bad band in the world. If you like, you can discover who this band is by playing the ‘O’ game. It’s simple to play. I’ > read more

Wed April 20th - 7:15 pm –7:18pm

Published on 2011-04-20 13:38:00

As she mocks her way through life like Epimetheus, the God of afterthought and father of excuses, it never once occurs to her that she’s wrong. This is the way of the arrogant woman and an arrogant woman she is but enough about Jill Y for the momen > read more

Yoda T

Published on 2011-04-19 14:31:00

Every sometimes, we like to share something with the world that’s only known by a handful of people. The only reason we know so much is that we have a time machine and travel back and forth in time, quite regularly. There’s a lot we can’t speak > read more

Argument No. 348

Published on 2011-04-18 15:17:00

I remember argument no. 348 vividly. It was time to tell Little Dill Y about the birds and the bees or as I like to call it, copulation. Jill Y and I had very different ideas on how to enlighten the little genius. I told him that Uncle Thirsty Dave i > read more

Face Value

Published on 2011-04-17 13:50:00

The first time you meet Sugartastic Daddy John, you’re under no illusion as to the type of individual you’re dealing with. Maybe it’s because he’s 8 ft tall with the funkiest, far-out ‘fro or maybe it’s those salacious, silky suits he wea > read more

When you need a helping hand, go and see Sugartastic Daddy John

Published on 2011-04-16 15:22:00

There isn't a day that goes by that Sugartastic Daddy John doesn't try to help someone out. When Scurvy Jane wanted a loan of some money to buy 10,000 liters of orange juice, she went to see Sugartastic who gave her the money on the spot. When Thirst > read more

Revenge is a sweet little response to an ad in a local shop window

Published on 2011-04-15 16:54:00

Little Dill Y came in from genius school the other day and was clearly distressed. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that Caroline, one of the girls in his genius class, attempted to convince him that god exists. I told him that that was nons > read more

Attack of the me

Published on 2011-04-14 13:41:00

No two people are the same. Even monozygotic (identical) twins, who develop from a single egg cell, have infrequent genetic differences due to mutations occurring during development. As a rule, this is a good thing but I was hoping to create a clone > read more

Heart shaped contents of a box?

Published on 2011-04-13 14:36:00

Every twice in a decade, I decide to be romantic and do something out of the goodness of my ice cold heart. Although I’m a highly creative and imaginative individual, I know as much about being romantic as I do about The Arbitration Act of 1888. I > read more

iFuture

Published on 2011-04-12 13:51:00

At It’s good to mock, we can’t help knowing stuff and don’t apologise for it. We were bored last night so we jumped into the time machine and headed to the future. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but the future looks pretty bleak. Bon Jovi > read more

When the music’s over, I sometimes fall asleep

Published on 2011-04-11 13:46:00

When the magic happens, the magic happens and it's a beautiful thing. Despite disagreeing with each other over the little things like global warming or the big things like Pepsi and Coca-Cola, it all makes sense under the covers where lust takes over > read more

Thirsty Dave lets his heart rule his head

Published on 2011-04-10 13:58:00

For some time now, Thirsty Dave has been wondering if he should come clean with his girlfriend and tell her that he has feelings for someone else. They've always been honest with each other and the only time he even told a half truth was when she ask > read more

The numbers don’t add up

Published on 2011-04-09 14:55:00

The big questions in life, continue to elude me: How do magnets work? At what precise moment did Chuck Norris become a legend? and Nuns? I'm not a complete and total loser. I know what shapes hula hoops are, how many zeros are in a squillion and that > read more

Unsavoury acquaintances of Sugartastic Daddy John–Pt.1

Published on 2011-04-08 16:45:00

Sugartastic Daddy John knows a lot of people. Some are cool, some are Bon Jovi fans. Due to the many diversifications of his many businesses, he sometimes has to deal with some unusually talented individuals. He was telling us about one gentleman who > read more

The training of Dan “The Action Man” Donnelly

Published on 2011-04-07 14:11:00

This is going to be hard to explain. For reasons of national security, I can't go into too much detail but you should get the picture. Thirsty Dave knows a guy called Seamus The Despicable. Seamus The Despicable has a soft spot for Scurvy Jane. Scurv > read more

A Cautionary Tale

Published on 2011-04-06 14:14:00

One day a talented but down on his luck musician discovered a magic lamp and rubbed it. A genie appeared and as you can imagine, granted him 3 wishes. The talented but down on his luck musician immediately wished that his band could write and record > read more

Brilliant Bovine Game

Published on 2011-04-05 15:25:00

Millions of years ago, before I was big, my parents would say things like "enjoy that music while you can Bill Y because when you grow up, you'll be so busy hating Bon Jovi that you'll have no time to listen to music". How right they were. When I was > read more

Q & A

Published on 2011-04-04 14:10:00

We’re very rarely stuck for words at It’s good to mock. When Jill Y and I are bored we like to mess with Little Dill Y’s head and confuse the bejaysus out of him. Like all 5 year olds, he’s full of questions - Why are Bon Jovi allowed t > read more

Jill Y let go the Lego complex and Little Dill Y produced some complex Lego

Published on 2011-04-03 12:22:00

If there's one thing Jill Y and I agree on it's nothing. That's right, Jill Y and I agree on nothing. The one thing we have in common is an all consuming need to remove Bon Jovi from the realm of consciousness. Oh yeah, we also have a son in common. > read more

It’s good to mock–Educating tomorrows Mockers, today.

Published on 2011-04-02 14:00:00

We like to think we’re a helpful collective at It's good to mock. Apart from taking pleasure in the inevitable moment when Bon Jovi will stop producing what they call music, our favorite thing is helping other people with other things. Dagmara is T > read more

Words v Pictures

Published on 2011-04-01 15:25:00

Our least favourite of the stupid sayings used to be ‘a picture is worth a thousand words’. The adage that a single image can display what a thousand words can, didn’t sit well with us at all. After all, a thousand words is a lot of words. I on > read more

Bad, Good and Excellent

Published on 2011-03-31 14:24:00

A wise man once saidBon Jovi are to music what Paris Hilton is to educationThat wise man was me and it’s just one of many wise things I’ve said. I don’t claim to say wise things very often but every once in a while, I accidently say something a > read more

Some words are not as good as others

Published on 2011-03-30 14:32:00

We're not big fans of the Irish playwright, essayist, and pamphleteer, George Bernard Shaw, preferring the more lucid writings of the Irish novelist, dramatist and screenwriter, Roddy Doyle. If for some reason, you are not picking up the implied sarc > read more

Give a man a drink and he'll drink it straight away but give a man an art degree and he'll never go hungry

Published on 2011-03-29 15:56:00

Two of Thirsty Dave's drinking companions had finished a hard days drinking and were as hungry as a hungry hungarian hunger striker who hadn't eaten for a long time. It was the early hours of the morning and they headed to the only fast food joint th > read more

Sometimes you can’t see what you’re looking for because it’s on your head

Published on 2011-03-28 14:53:00

In our role as super cool parents, Jill Y and I like to encourage little Dill Y in everything he even thinks about doing. There are exceptions of course and like all 5 year olds, he changes his mind all the time. Recently he wanted to be Santa Claus, > read more

Right your wrongs

Published on 2011-03-27 11:54:00

Scurvy Jane sits on the fence so much that her address should be 35A The Fence, Fenceville, Fenceland. If you were to ask her how much she hates Bon Jovi, she would probably tell you that she neither hates them nor does she wear an 'I heart Bon Jovi' > read more

Cats the way to do it.

Published on 2011-03-26 15:55:00

We seem to be on a roll at the moment. Everything isn't going wrong like it normally does and we found a radio station that promises not to play Bon Jovi. As the self appointed Patron Saint of Mockers, I instructed the collective to use this time con > read more

Thirsty Dave’s Intervention

Published on 2011-03-25 12:44:00

Things were getting totally out of hand with Thirsty Dave so we decided to have an intervention. Apart from drinking during his breakfast, lunch, dinner and tea, he invented 7 new times to have food during the day and guess what? He drinks during all > read more

Blasts from the past

Published on 2011-03-24 15:14:00

Jill Y is one of those sentimental girlies. She remembers what she was wearing when we first met though that's not too hard to do, considering all prison uniforms are the same. She still has the glass from the first drink she threw over me. To t > read more

When I was younger, I was a Mommies boy

Published on 2011-03-23 15:32:00

I've always been different to the other kids and when I say 'different' I mean, not the same. I don't know what it was but when I was a little mocker, my friends were interested in climbing trees while I was interested in climbing pyramids. It didn't > read more

The word according to Big Red

Published on 2011-03-22 14:35:00

I've learned a lot of things from nobody. That's right, nobody has taught me very much and as a result, I know very little. Having said that, there are a few things that I do know. I know that when I pretend to be a robot walking down the street, I g > read more

Demetrius and his way with words.

Published on 2011-03-21 15:50:00

One of Sugartastic Daddy John's, sisters pimps colleagues, recently found himself in a predicament. Demetrius wouldn't be the type of guy who's good at talking himself out of trouble. He has a habit of saying the first thing that comes into his mind > read more

Thirsty Dave offers his own brand of therapy to those with speech impediments

Published on 2011-03-20 10:22:00

Thirsty Dave is always on the lookout to make some extra cash. He's an entrepreneur par excellence who recognises opportunity where most don't. When he was younger, he had a speech impediment which he successfully managed to cure. I told him that he > read more

The many similarities between me and Bear Grylls.

Published on 2011-03-19 15:24:00

Jill Y reckons I have a lot in common with Bear Grylls, the youngest Briton to climb Everest until someone younger managed to do it. I've yet to climb Everest but I was the youngest person to ever hate Bon Jovi. When I was 27 minutes old, I hated the > read more

Unclean Alan & Colour-blind Johnny

Published on 2011-03-18 16:44:00

I don't make a lot of sense because sense is overrated and overstated. I do speak a lot of nonsense and for that I'll never apologise. Purple, barney, dinosaur. Unclean Alan didn't get his name because he didn't wash himself. He got his name because > read more

The Reluctant Advertiser

Published on 2011-03-17 13:10:00

Thirsty Dave’s neighbour, Handy Andy Anderson is going through the change of life. His wife has slowly but surely been changing him into a grown up. He’s stopped coming out to play with the rest of us, doesn’t drink and now goes to bed at 9pm. > read more

Crimes & Misdemeanors & Felonies & Marriages

Published on 2011-03-16 16:11:00

Fate, destiny, kismet, call it what you like but some things were just meant to be. When Sugartastic Daddy John said "I do" to wife no. 62, little did he know that that night, Sugartastic Baby John would be conceived. The Daddy now has 57 kids and a > read more

I don’t think we’ll be multi-trillionaires any day soon

Published on 2011-03-15 15:57:00

Every now and again, we count our money and realise we haven't got any. It's at times like this that we try and come up with an invention that will make us multi-trillionaires. I gathered the collective, knocked our heads together but > read more

Welcome to argument no. 867

Published on 2011-03-14 15:18:00

It's written in the scriptures that he/she/he-she who mocks Bon Jovi, who really mocks Bon Jovi with all their sarcastic might, will one day be rewarded with music of vibrant melody and rhythm. One day I hope to reach such a plateau where Bon Jovi do > read more

The mystery of MC Hardly Handsome Harvey and the squeaky sound

Published on 2011-03-13 11:54:00

We went to see our fifth favourite band 'The Angelic Murderers'. They play a kind of death metal, gospel music with a lyrical emphasis on the months of March and April, 1997. They're a very polished band and before they go on stage, they usually have > read more

Shut up already

Published on 2011-03-12 15:50:00

Certain products and services become so engrained in daily life that they become indispensable. For many businesses and indeed people who are not businesses, the internet has become invaluable. Some of you crazy kids out there would rather hear a Bon > read more

Sick, twisted and evil.

Published on 2011-03-11 16:51:00

As parents we all dread the day when our son or daughter comes home and tells us that they believe in something. If you're lucky, their new found faith is in throwing stuff at circus performers. If you're unlucky, they might have found religion and i > read more

Statements of absolute fact

Published on 2011-03-10 15:13:00

Little Dill Y has never wondered why women give birth more than men. This is because when he was 2, we told him about the birds and the bees or as Jill Y likes to call it "the creation of a new organism by combining the genetic material of two organi > read more

Believe

Published on 2011-03-09 15:51:00

Scurvy Janes's stalker, Sci-fi fan Fran has been going through a bit of a crisis of faith so we offered to help. At first we thought it might be a bit tricky because she wanted to believe in God and we're not massive fans of religion at all but thank > read more

It’s good to mock – keeping you up to date with the old technology

Published on 2011-03-08 15:31:00

Technology these days moves faster than a speeding peregrine falcon trying to catch Usain Bolt chasing a speeding peregrine falcon. If you take your eye off the ball, you won't see the ball but why would you be looking at the ball when you should be > read more

My name is Bill Y and I love newspapers.

Published on 2011-03-07 14:03:00

Newspapers are great and I love them. It's almost as if they contain stories that tell us stuff. The last time I visited the Cook County Forest Preserve, I encountered a number of people who were not full of life and when I say they were not full of > read more

Why is there so much injustice in the world?

Published on 2011-03-06 13:36:00

If there's one thing that bothers us at It's good to mock, it's not understanding how magnets work, how tomato sauce is made and racism. One of Sugartastc Daddy Johns 68 kids told Scurvy Janes sisters, boyfriends, twin sister that he was driving down > read more

I know you two weeks so No, I won’t marry you.

Published on 2011-03-05 16:15:00

I just took a call from a distraught Thirsty Dave. He's been seeing a girl for the last 2 weeks and is besotted with her. They have so much in common. She owns a bar and he loves drinking, she spends all of her time in the bar and so does he and her > read more

Moving with the times

Published on 2011-03-04 16:50:00

At It's good to mock, we embrace modern gadgets as soon as they become available. We're massively hip to the groovy technologies and think it’s really neat to be using things like analogue mobile phones, betamax video recorders and ghetto blasters. > read more

I can’t get no sleep

Published on 2011-03-03 16:29:00

Stress effects people different people in different ways. I used to think I was immune to it but the more people who like Bon Jovi, the more I don’t understand why people like Bon Jovi. It’s got to the stage where I sometimes find it hard to slee > read more

The expensive nutcracker

Published on 2011-03-02 14:16:00

I couldn't think what the special occasion was. It wasn't her birthday, anniversary or valentines day but she still let me know in no uncertain terms that I was a pathetic little mocker for forgetting to get her a present. As far as I was concerned, > read more

Even when we try to do the right thing, it doesn’t work out for us.

Published on 2011-03-01 15:26:00

Sometimes you just get the feeling that something isn't going to turn out the way you thought it would. We thought we would try and reduce our carbon footprint and collectively do what we could to help our ailing planet. Jill Y has started to buy loc > read more

Random things that give me a boner

Published on 2011-02-28 14:23:00

Jill Y tells me that I have to open up to you and express my feelings. I don't really want to but she said she would withhold certain favours if I didn't. To cut a long story short, I've been getting turned on by things that wouldn't and shouldn't tu > read more

Rule 38

Published on 2011-02-27 13:26:00

We take a lot of things for granted. Before all the tubes were put together, this internet thing as we know it, didn’t exist. As more and more tubes were put together we gradually learned that Chuck Norris lived there, Rick Astley’s dreadful song > read more

We're not, not streetwise

Published on 2011-02-26 12:12:00

We're not the most intelligent of folk at It's good to mock but that doesn't mean we're stupid. Sure, we don't have letters after our names and can't claim to do miraculous stuff like maths but we're streetwise and that's got to count for something. > read more

The Exorcism of Little Dill Y Pt. 1

Published on 2011-02-25 16:48:00

The following events take place between 8am 17-02-11 and 11am 18-02-11. Little Dill Y was accidentally exposed to the music of Bon Jovi so we immediately rinsed his ears with the music of Nick Cave. He didn't seem to be infected but there was no way > read more

Vroom vroom

Published on 2011-02-24 13:15:00

One of the earliest memories I have is when I was a very little mocker, being pushed up and down in a pram with someone making the sound of a car as I went back and forth. The car sound is something that I really focussed in on and as far as my littl > read more

06-06-06 6:66pm

Published on 2011-02-23 13:42:00

Candy Sweetcheeks is Sugartastic Daddy John's 1st wife and his 26th favourite. She would of made the top 25 but she has a problem with sharing and wouldn't agree to the 25 way. She was telling us about the day she collected her exam results bac > read more

The effects of Ethanol on the creative process

Published on 2011-02-22 13:49:00

Scurvy Janes's sister "Ring Worm" Rhonda is doing a thesis on the effects of alcohol on creativity. It just so happens that Thirsty Dave is a man who consumes alcohol at fairly regular intervals and also happens to be massively creative so he's the p > read more

To each his own

Published on 2011-02-21 14:01:00

Lots of people say "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and lots of people are right when they say it. Thirsty Dave likes a woman who gives off a certain whiff of alcohol. This is because it reminds him of what he holds dearest in life. Sugartastic > read more

Make it go

Published on 2011-02-20 13:31:00

A number of years ago, the eclectic collective at It's good to mock could always be found watching Star Trek with the one and only Captain Picard. Jean-Luc was a captain who knew how to get things done, a man with integrity and everything about him h > read more

Cause and effect

Published on 2011-02-19 16:14:00

There's no point in using different words to make the same point so I won't. Decisions have outcomes. Actions have consequences. What we choose to do today has an effect on tomorrow. When Sugartastic Daddy John got married to wife no. 27, he made his > read more

Pride in the name of religion

Published on 2011-02-18 17:53:00

A massively wise man once wisely said:"If people learn to hate, to truly hate Bon Jovi, they will then learn to truly appreciate real music by real bands" I'd like to say that that massively wise man was me because it was and therefore I will - "that > read more

It’s all in the preparation

Published on 2011-02-17 13:47:00

Jill Y's nickname is Einstein, not after the famous dog from Back to the Future but some guy called Albert who apparently was a German-born theoretical physicist who discovered the theory of general relativity. What I'm trying to say is that she's on > read more

Q. How long is not a long time? A. The amount of time Scurvy Jane will probably last in her new job.

Published on 2011-02-16 14:28:00

Scurvy Jane has had quite a few jobs. She tried her hand at being a hand model but the fact that she has scurvy didn't really work in her favour. Her next job was in Sales where she attempted to sell teeth to Gummi Bears. For some reason she never ta > read more

Ken's kin can't do what Ken can but Ken's kids can can-can and Ken can't.

Published on 2011-02-15 15:08:00

My mate Ken "if anyone can Ken can" Cantwell, is a uniquely talented individual. He acquires things that other people can't acquire. The problem for Ken is his kids. Ken's kin can't do what Ken can but Ken's kids can can-can and Ken can't. Because Ke > read more

Crushed by the wheels of attraction

Published on 2011-02-14 11:05:00

As it's St. Valentine's Day we thought we would share our recollections of our first crush. In a somewhat surprising outcome, we were all 11 or 12 when it happened. Sugartastic Daddy John's first crush was when he was 12. He was getting his hai > read more

Clockwork

Published on 2011-02-13 14:53:00

Some things happen like clockwork. The pub opens and all of a sudden we have the disappearance of Thirsty Dave. Sugartastic Daddy John meets a nice girl, falls in love and gets married – so far he has 28 wives. Jill Y swears that she only uses the > read more

The post of Bernadette

Published on 2011-02-13 14:53:00

Bernadette over at iwasntbloggedyesterday has seen it fit to give us a Lol award. For this we are massively thankful. There are some conditions that go with the award but Thirsty Dave has disappeared and we have to go and see what pub we can find him > read more

The state of the world as we know it

Published on 2011-02-12 17:27:00

Q. Is there any type of voodoo you do to U2 to shut Bono up? A. We don't know. This is just one of the many things we don't know. If you've come here looking for a discussion on four-handed dentistry, you've come to the wrong place - this much we do > read more

Bon Jovi – The insomniacs dream

Published on 2011-02-11 14:28:00

Today we begin with an inspirational tale. For years and years I've been praying to Hypnos - the Greek god of sleep and it's now starting to pay off. I just have to hear a fraction of a second of a Bon Jovi song and I'm immediately sent straight to s > read more

Fact or Unfact? You decide

Published on 2011-02-10 13:40:00

We like to think we're an impartial bunch of mockers at It's good to mock. Sure, we have our views which are always right but that's just the way it is. You know our feelings on the the lack of talent of Bon Jovi, our fear of nuns and the sound of no > read more

Hot Stuff

Published on 2011-02-09 15:34:00

This is more than likely not going to make us millionaires so I think we're safe enough sharing the idea with you. Jill Y is a Scientist and gets to work on some pretty cool secret stuff. Nobody believes she invented a time machine and if nobody beli > read more

Oh no, the woe of Joe made Joe so low. How low could Joe’s woe go?

Published on 2011-02-08 13:41:00

Sometimes we do something because we want to and sometimes we do something because we're forced to. Unfortunately I can't really think of any examples about what I'm talking about. This is probably because I haven't got a clue what I'm talking about. > read more

The gospel according to Bill Y and Jill Y

Published on 2011-02-07 14:18:00

And so we come to this inevitable juncture. It was always going to happen but I didn’t think it would happen so soon. Little Dill Y is 5 years of age but he’s very mature for his age and goes on like a 6 year old. Jill Y has taught him about grad > read more

The word according to the book it’s written in

Published on 2011-02-06 13:04:00

It's general election time in Ireland and one party who have been bestowing on us the virtues of recycling have so far pushed 46 different leaflets through the door advertising their policy on, wait for it… recycling! While lot's of printing compan > read more

The search for Lisa’s Tomato Man

Published on 2011-02-05 15:48:00

Jill Y’s grandmother’s best friend Lisa was telling us a story about the time she went to see Miles Davis play in 1958. As she was telling the story she was reliving every moment in vivid detail and we were hanging on every word she was saying. S > read more

Star Wars Fan Man

Published on 2011-02-04 17:02:00

Before I was big, I was little and when I was little I liked the Star Wars films. I went to see the films lots of times, collected the action figures and put posters on my wall. My friends and I would spend all our money on Star Wars merchandise and > read more

So much to do, so little time

Published on 2011-02-03 10:48:00

Today was a day unlike any other for today was the day I watched daytime television. Don’t ask me how it happened but I had a day off work. After calling in just to make sure it wasn’t some crazy drunken dream, it was confirmed, I actually had th > read more

It’s good to finally know something

Published on 2011-02-02 16:21:00

Some things should never be explained. How magnets work, the fairy tale of the guy who supposedly walked on water and why anyone listens to Bon Jovi, to name but a few. We’re not a very smart collective at It’s good to mock but tonight we’re go > read more

Star Wars and that Nazi Pope guy

Published on 2011-02-01 14:54:00

Thirsty Dave is not shy about having a drink or 36. He has a schedule which he religiously sticks to. He gets up mostly in the afternoon, drinks, goes to sleep and wakes up, mostly in the afternoon. In between attempting to quench his insatiable parc > read more

Sugartastic Daddy John – he may just help you find your soul mate even if your soul mate was the Chancellor of Germany from 1933 to 1945.

Published on 2011-01-31 14:16:00

We like to think we're a fairly astute collective at It's good to mock but if there's one thing we never notice, it's invisible things. When you boil things down, people are essentially the same. We just want to love and be loved. With this in mind, > read more

Holy Ghost-busters

Published on 2011-01-30 14:37:00

When it comes to religions, it’s important that we remain impartial and mock each one of them with the same intensity and sarcastic vigour as possible. After all, it wouldn’t be right to simply choose one religious path that has no factuality wha > read more

It’s good to mock – helping Scurvy Jane to build her confidence

Published on 2011-01-29 11:14:00

One of the lesser known services we provide at It’s good to mock is confidence building. Scurvy Jane has a problem. Apart from having scurvy, she has a problem telling jokes. It doesn't matter how hard she tries or how funny the joke actually is, s > read more

Optipess or Pessiopt

Published on 2011-01-28 14:59:00

The collective at It’s good to mock have one thing in common. We always look at the glass two halves full. Our simple ideology involves a deep rooted hatred for Bon Jovi, fear of Nuns and a firm belief that laughing at yourself can overcome all obs > read more

Sometimes Jill Y turns around and gives me a dose of my own medicine OR I’ve no problem being the mocker so I have to accept that sometimes I will become the mockee.

Published on 2011-01-27 14:56:00

A new law was recently passed which dictates that on the weekends, Jill Y will makes the breakfast one morning and I look after it the other afternoon. Last Sunday, Little Dill Y was downstairs reading about applied quantitative methods for trading a > read more

I don’t care if you’re not impressed but I do care what he thinks

Published on 2011-01-26 14:32:00

The sequence of events are always the same. Jill Y somehow expects me to behave all 'normal' and 'mature' and 'non stupid' but I'm none of those things, never will be and wouldn’t even know where to begin. I've come to terms with being a complete a > read more

TGIGF – Thank God It’s Good Friday

Published on 2011-01-25 15:06:00

We like to think we're a helpful collective at It's good to mock. When Scurvy Jane found a magic lamp and rubbed it, a genie appeared and offered her three wishes. Rather than ask for something for herself she thought of humanity and wished for Bon J > read more

A curse on those cursor’s

Published on 2011-01-24 14:59:00

I turned on the computer on Monday but the cursor didn’t work so I bought a new mouse but it still didn’t work. I turned on the computer on Tuesday but the cursor didn’t work so I bought a new mouse from a different store but it still didn’t > read more

Sometimes someone does something so stupid that it makes me look less stupid than I actually am

Published on 2011-01-23 13:28:00

I've been responsible for saying and doing a considerable amount of stupid things and I doubt if that'll change in the foreseeable future. It's important to hold your hands up and admit when you are wrong so I constantly walk around with my hands hel > read more

24 hours in a tray

Published on 2011-01-22 17:07:00

Thirsty Dave's favourite number is 24 because there's 24 hours in a day and 24 cans of beer in a tray. By the same token, his favourite colour is black because black is the colour of Guinness and black is the colour he sees when he blacks out after d > read more

Some things just feel right

Published on 2011-01-21 16:31:00

“I'm not a baby and I'm not stupid”, said the stupid baby. That stupid baby was me and I’ve said and done may stupid things since I’ve become a stupid adult. If you were to ask me to choose the most stupid thing I’ve ever done, I’d ask yo > read more

Avian Hypnotism

Published on 2011-01-20 13:57:00

In an attempt to do something useful with my life, I've been learning how to hypnotize birds. I began by watching Dr. Doolittle and learned how to talk to the animals. It's not really that hard to master the technique and anyway, once we discard the > read more

Priceless

Published on 2011-01-19 15:38:00

One of the benefits of having a 5 yr old budding genius is that you get a chance to get those awkward little conversations out of the way at an early age. When Little Dill Y was 2, we had the talk about the birds and the bees or to use the fancy word > read more

Little Dill Y’s very own personal Make a Wish Foundation

Published on 2011-01-18 15:32:00

In what must be a record, Jill Y and I didn't have an argument for the last 20 minutes. It was fun while it lasted. I'd forgotten what it was like to have a conversation without a sharp object being fired at you like a massively confused demented hea > read more

Thirsty Dave and the Aqua Bar

Published on 2011-01-17 13:43:00

Thirsty Dave usually looks at the glass 2 halves full but he’s been saying bad things about the Aqua Bar since it opened last year. His main grievance is that it’s a non alcohol bar and as such, doesn’t sell alcohol. To Thirsty Dave, a bar with > read more

Please be aware of this false alarm doing the rounds

Published on 2011-01-16 12:52:00

Thank gods we’re here to tell it like it is. We received a very disturbing email last night and for one brief moment, the entire collective here at It’s good to mock were shocked to our very core. There are some things in life that operate on lev > read more

Scurvy Jane’s new (probably short lived) job

Published on 2011-01-15 17:16:00

Scurvy Jane found a new job in a call centre for a well known computer manufacturer. If you buy a new pc and are having problems connecting the hardware, you call Scurvy Jane and she helps you put everything together. The problem is that she gets bor > read more

Different solutions for the problems

Published on 2011-01-14 16:41:00

Jill Y and I are very different people. She’s very analytical, has an aptitude for science and in her own head, is always right. I‘m not the brightest of mockers, have an aptitude for rubbing people up the wrong way and don’t even know what ‘ > read more

Did you hear the one about Bob’s birthday present?

Published on 2011-01-13 14:03:00

Jill Y told me a story that was told to her by Agnetha that was told to her by Scurvy Jane that was told to her by Candy Sweetcheeks that was told to her by Jenny from the block that was told to her by Sally Piper that was overheard by Sally Piper's > read more

Where babies come from

Published on 2011-01-12 14:09:00

Another average day at It's good to mock HQ. Little Dill Y was trying to decide which religion he wanted to mock most. Thirsty Dave was ……. that’s right, he was drinking for what else can what someone with the name 'Thirsty Dave' do except drin > read more

What’s wrong with this picture?

Published on 2011-01-11 15:05:00

Each evening, we take some time to explain something profound to Little Dill Y.We're not talking about minor issues like trapped miners. We're talking about the issues which have an effect on this generation and generations to come such as why > read more

It can’t be that time

Published on 2011-01-10 14:50:00

I hold my hands up, massively guilty and not one little bit proud of it. Even though I did what I did, I didn't mean it. It was just one of those things you do in the heat of the moment and regret later. I've since apologised and it's all good but it > read more

NRG Drink

Published on 2011-01-09 09:51:00

Mocking can be tiring. When we were little mockers we could mock around the clock. As time goes by and we get a bit older, we need to take more care of ourselves than we used to. Because of this, we sometimes need a quick pick me up and sometimes tur > read more

Neil Old

Published on 2011-01-08 16:18:00

Before we start this, I’m not ageist and I don’t want any of you smart old mockers out there claiming that I am. And so we begin. Until recently, I’ve been a big Neil Young fan. Even in the days when he released what amounted to a load of disto > read more

Embrace the words while you can

Published on 2011-01-07 16:00:00

Words are great. When we say or write them, we can express a multitude of things. If you know the right words to use you can get yourself out of the trickiest of situations but what happens when the words don’t come? Sooner or later it happens to u > read more

Pinocchio

Published on 2011-01-06 14:24:00

When you’re blissfully unaware of the world around you, life is pretty sweet. If you don’t see the injustices of the world, they can’t bother you. Over the years we’ve learned not to learn anything about anything at all. This is something tha > read more

Abstract Art

Published on 2011-01-05 13:56:00

We decided to teach Little Dill Y how to appreciate Art. it wasn't easy since we haven't got a clue how to appreciate it ourselves. I remember a smart person telling me that Bon Jovi are to music what Ryanair is to first class travel but that's not i > read more

Brilliant problems require brilliant solutions

Published on 2011-01-04 13:28:00

I think it was me who once said:"Being brilliant is just something I am, like a fear of nuns or a deep filled hatred of Bon Jovi - it is what it is".Being brilliant isn't always easy, especially being a brilliant parent. There's so much negativ > read more

Paying the price

Published on 2011-01-03 11:26:00

The credit card is one of the most dangerous and yet useful inventions. It’s dangerous because if Jill Y finds where I’ve hidden it, the house will be full of new shoes. It’s useful because when I go out for a couple of dozen beers with Thirsty > read more

Apparently you get what you pay for in this world

Published on 2011-01-02 16:58:00

Ryanair is a great Irish success story. The company paved the way for low cost air travel and many airlines soon followed the same business model. When you fly with Ryanair, you now exactly what you get – cheap travel, the offer of scratch cards an > read more

If it’s not on the internet, it’s not true

Published on 2011-01-01 17:04:00

We're a gullible collective at It's good to mock. Because we always choose to see the good in people, we believe all that we're told. As you can imagine, this sometimes creates a problem as we don't know if we're been told the truth or a complete dis > read more

One of these things is doing it’s own thing, one of these things just isn’t the same.

Published on 2010-12-31 12:03:00

Christmas is just over and already Jill Y is talking about next years festivities. She won’t mind me telling you that she’s not the best cook in the world. I could go as far as saying that Jill Y is to cooking what Paris Hilton is to classiness b > read more