Blog Feed: Healing from Abuse

A warm welcome...

Published on 2011-11-15 00:11:00

... to Jan ~ great that you have joined us and I hope you will find what you are looking for! > read more

I have been singing over the bones

Published on 2011-11-14 22:00:00

Yesterday was an astonishing day:Early in the morning I had a doctors appointment for a full body check as I struggle more and more with my joint pains, diarrhea, headaches and exhaustion. I had to go to another doctor as mine is away having had a baby. I felt safe with the man but it still was difficult for me to be examined by one. But I trusted him. I had a really bad pain when he touched where the colon is on my right side right down at my hip bone. So he transferred me to the bowel speciali [..] > read more

Destiny's Child ~ The Story Of Beauty

Published on 2011-11-14 03:04:00

And another famous band who tells a story about abuse. A story so many of us have lived ~ it is not just fiction or a song!If you want to see the lyrics please go to: > read more

A warm welcome ....

Published on 2011-11-13 23:59:00

..... to Bongo. It is great to have you here!!!!! > read more

An incident....

Published on 2011-11-12 04:52:00

..... in autumn 2000 brought everything back though.I was walking the dog and from far saw a man standing his hands in his pants. As I came closer he took them out closed everything came up to me and asked me if I minded that he was wanking. I did not know what to do, stayed in the conversation out of politeness but was evasive in my answers. In the end I just left but was really confused. I did not know how to react, just to leave it and make jokes or what to do. Later on I talked to my husband [..] > read more

I stayed without a counsellor....

Published on 2011-11-11 14:36:00

..... for a while but I do not deal very well with major life changes. In that particular year I finished my professional education, started to work self-employed, moved to another place and got married. At the end of that year I felt the need to be on my own for a few days and went to a monastery close by.I did not take part in their religious rituals but took time to have a look where I stood, connect with my spiritual self and just relax. The realisation that there was something deeply wrong [..] > read more

My first counsellor outside university....

Published on 2011-11-10 02:03:00

..... had just finished her training and I think she had trouble to deal with my emotions. I did not feel very secure with her and I just scraped on the top of everything. But we moved away anyway after my practical year. There is one image that stayed in my mind though that she used about fears and unhelpful behaviour: She said something like they keep coming back like ants and they will challenge you as long as you find the right "antidote" but you have to keep doing that. It won't stop just w [..] > read more

A warm welcome....

Published on 2011-11-10 01:44:00

to Leah and Floridancing! It is good to have you here and I hope you find what you are looking for! > read more

Thanks to JeffsSong and Rachel.....

Published on 2011-11-09 03:08:00

Thanks to JeffsSong and Rachel for their feedback on my last post. It was definitely the most difficult to write about as it is still so much connected with my feelings of guilt and shame. It is helpful to know that others experienced the same and also to have some prayers to back the healing process. Thank you guys!!!!!Well these memories did not leave me alone. No matter how much I tried, they came and left me as they pleased. I tried to avoid them, make sense of it, integrate them but I was n [..] > read more

I still have not come to terms with it! (trigger)

Published on 2011-11-08 04:59:00

I still do not know why I did that and what I did exactly. Some years later when I was further on in getting to know what abuse means I told my brother about it. Maybe I should not have as he was as shocked as I was and stopped having contact with me some years later. He perceives me as an abuser. I was 8 years old and did not know what I was doing. I can remember at the age of 11 I somehow gathered that there is something wrong. And I stopped myself which was hard as it was like an addiction. I [..] > read more