Blog d'Elisson

AN END... AND A BEGINNING

Published on 2010-06-17 21:45:00

“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” - Mark TwainAs yet, there have been no such reports - exaggerated or not - at least as far as my own death is concerned. And I’ll be perfectly content to keep it that way.As far as Blog d’Elisson is concerned, however, it is a different story. This is my last post on this site.Oh, do not weep for my silly little blog. I will continue my Bloggy Activities elsewhere. My new site, Lost in the Cheese Aisle, is up and running, and I hope

ON PENMANSHIP

Published on 2010-06-17 15:07:00

Those of us who have taken a few trips around the Sun have seen plenty of progress over the years. But it’s a two-edged sword, this business of progress. While some changes improve our lives in ways small and great, as we watch new technologies overtake old, some things are, inevitably, lost.I have a device in my pocket that’s roughly the size of a candy bar. With it, I can talk to almost anyone I care to, anywhere in the world. I can send written messages. I can look at a map and get d

GRILLED YARDBIRD AND OTHER DELIGHTS

Published on 2010-06-17 11:54:00

Eric, that most esteemed Tennessee Renaissance Man, knows his way around a grill. Those of us fortunate enough to have attended his legendary birthday parties know that when it comes to grilling tender, succulent chops, the Straight White Grillmeister is at the top of his game... and She Who Must Be Obeyed still raves about a sirloin steak he prepared for her several months ago.But, until this week, Eric had never tried to grill a whole yardbird. It was left to old Uncle Elisson to show him ho

MR. AND MRS. RITZY-PANTS

Published on 2010-06-16 17:13:00

It being our thirty-third wedding anniversary this past Saturday, we decided to celebrate by spending the night at a Fancy-Ass Hostelry. For nothing helps you escape the drudgery of the day-to-day than a night away from home. And if your quotidian existence is pleasant, why, so much the better.In preparation for our Mini-Honeymoon, I had, a week or so prior, booked us in at the Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Buckhead. We had stayed there a few times before - once in the 1980’s, once in the late ’9

THIRTY-THREE

Published on 2010-06-12 07:29:00

1,041,400,800 seconds.17,356,680 minutes.289,278 hours.12,053 days.33 years.That’s how long She Who Must Be Obeyed and I have been married, as of today.Time flies when you’re having fun. I remember our wedding day as if it were yesterday. (Keep in mind that I sometimes cannot remember what I had for breakfast yesterday.)And if I could choose whether to do it all over again, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

COMICAL CATCHWORDS

Published on 2010-06-11 14:34:00

Once upon a time, the funnies were filled with funny words.Of course, if you say any word enough times, it begins to sound completely ridiculous.Try it. Pick a word at random, then say it about twenty times.Shirt.Shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt shirt.Pretty silly, eh?Given that you can take almost any regular, everyday word and render it laughable, imagine creating your own silly words... and having them burned in

WATCHFUL

Published on 2010-06-10 19:32:00

The ever-vigilant Hakuna sits by the front door, ready to get a Big Tail at the sight of any flower-munching rabbits.Update: Friday Ark #299 is open for business over at the Modulator.This Sunday, be sure to check out Carnival of the Cats, the 326th edition of which will be hosted by that most irrepressible Nikita over at Meowsings of an Opinionated Pussycat.Update: CotC #326 is up... with Hakuna in pole position!

HERE’S SOMETHING WE HAVEN’T SEEN IN A LONG-ASS TIME

Published on 2010-06-08 22:38:00

An Elisson-eye view of my bathroom scale this morning.The last time that number had a seven in the tens column, it was sometime in the 1980’s. After that, my inner slob took over.I’m down twenty-eight pounds now - about six away from my goal. At my current rate, I ought to get there around the beginning of July. Wish me luck.

A MESS O’ MUDBUGS

Published on 2010-06-08 18:19:00

The fare we enjoy during our annual Alabama Golf Outings ranges, as such things tend to do, from the ridiculous to the sublime.We’ve had tough, gristle-packed steaks at chain restaurants... and, sometimes at the same place on the same evening, others that were “like buttah.”We’ve traveled to the nasty parts of town for barbecue... because that’s where the best barbecue places are supposed to be. But sometimes it turns out to be more miscue than barbecue.This year we hit a place called

ARM AND LEGUME

Published on 2010-06-07 21:27:00

A bean is a bean, but a pea is a relief.      - Billie Bob z''lLegumes, legumesEnhance cardiac healthThe more one consumesThe less one is able to pass flatus in stealth      - Elisson***The Missus was inspired, the other day, to make a Four-Bean Salad. Having no recipe handy, she just made one up on the fly.Black beans, little white beans, little red beans, garbanzos, all rinsed and drained... sliced red and yellow peppers... a few sli

A PROFUSION OF BUTTERFLIES

Published on 2010-06-06 20:54:00

The wildlife was in abundance this weekend as we hacked our way around Hampton Cove, the Huntsville, Alabama outpost of the Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail.Some scene-setting is in order. Alabama, home of the aforementioned Trail, offers excellent golf on challenging layouts, all at reasonable prices... and so, once a year, I join a small army of Golf-Playing Idiots on a westward trek to the Heart of Dixie.Small army of Golf-Playing Idiots. (I’m in the back.)This year’s trip was was a step-o

FRIDAY RANDOM TEN

Published on 2010-06-04 06:54:00

I neglected to post the usual Friday Random Ten last week owing to our being out-of-town... and, after receiving hundreds of angry e-mails, I won’t be letting that happen again anytime soon.Right.But, after all, it is Friday again... and you’ll be wanting some Choons fresh outta the Little White Choon-Box, won’t you?Here we go:Mr. Moonlight - The BeatlesFrom the Beatles For Sale album, probably the weakest one in their entire discography.Idioteque - RadioheadBacked Up - Bill HicksLovers &a

COBBLE, COBBLE

Published on 2010-06-03 16:39:00

There’s an old saying: The cobbler’s children have no shoes. Whether that’s true or not, I cannot say - but one thing is certain. Eli’s children have cobbler.I submit for your delectation a photograph of the blueberry cobbler prepared by The Other Elisson and served forth on our Daddy’s eighty-fifth birthday alongside gargantuan slabs of layer cake and chunks of melon.The Other Elisson’s Blueberry Cobbler.Sexy, huh?I permitted myself a taste of the berries. They were packed with de

CARTOONY ’KOONY

Published on 2010-06-03 15:53:00

Cartoony ’Koony. [Click to embiggen.]Hakuna permits one of her subjects to approach her Royal Personage and offer skritchings.The image has been doctored in Photoshop, making it sorta painterly and/or cartoony. Hey, that’s it - Cartoony ’Koony!Update: Friday Ark #298 is afloat at the Modulator... and this Sunday, Carnival of the Cats rolls around to Three Tabby Cats in Vienna.Update 2: CotC #325 is up.

A MEMORABLE BIRTHDAY

Published on 2010-06-02 12:39:00

Eli (Hizzownself), with Toni, his Better Half.We celebrated the Old Man’s eighty-fifth birthday last weekend in grand style.Earlier that day, we had driven out east to do a little winery hopping. It seems that Long Island, in the past three decades, has become a mini-hotbed of viniculture: Who knew? About forty wineries dot the various towns on the eastern end of the island, with most on the North Fork... so that is where we headed.At the Lenz Winery in Peconic, we stopped for a tasting amid

A CULINARY CONUNDRUM

Published on 2010-05-31 14:09:00

Q: Is it OK to put turkey on a Greek salad?A: Only if you’re especially Hungary.

ANOTHER TRIP AROUND THE SUN FOR THE FAMILY PATRIARCH

Published on 2010-05-28 09:22:00

Eli, Hizzownself: The older you get, the less inhibited you are in many ways.SWMBO: Oy.* * *Today is Eli’s eighty-fifth birthday. Yesterday, he kicked off the morning by playing four games of doubles racquetball - something he does routinely twice a week. He only won the first and last games, a clear indication that he is slowing down.Eli shows his less-inhibited side.Despite his age, our Dad is not a complete Luddite. I’m writing these words on his very own computer, the selfsame machine

ONE TINY-ASS DAWG

Published on 2010-05-27 07:32:00

This past weekend, the Mistress of Sarcasm and I enjoyed the hospitality of Elder Daughter and her two housemates.It was our first chance to check out Elder Daughter’s new digs. Formerly living solo in an Adams Morgan apartment, E.D. moved to a large, rambling house in the rapidly gentrifying H corridor where she is part of a sort of Roomie-Family. It’s a huge improvement over her former situation.Miss Kitty, one of the Animal Denizens of Elder Daughter’s house.In addition to Elder Daugh

THE MOSQUITO TRUCK

Published on 2010-05-25 20:24:00

As the month of May slips away, soon to be replaced by June, I think back on my Snot-Nose Days. Back then, we’d be in school for the first three weeks of June, our summer vacation beginning roughly around the time of the solstice.By the time the school year had worn down to those last few days, things were downright steamy. This was back before classrooms were air-conditioned, and hundred-degree days were not unknown. You could get a sunstroke running around on the playground during recess.

RIDE THIS

Published on 2010-05-25 20:17:00

The sharp-eyed Mistress of Sarcasm could not help but notice this Washington, D.C. taxicab’s ID number as we left last week’s TEDxPotomac conference. And I could not help but capture it for posterity as we all cracked up laughing.Makes you wonder just what kind of rides this guy was selling, eh?

BARBECUE IN BIRMINGHAM

Published on 2010-05-25 15:38:00

Smokemeisters Henry L., Jerry C., and Elisson whip out their meat.There’s an old joke about a rabbi who is out of town on a mid-week business trip. He checks into his hotel and heads out to a local eatery... and, as he peruses the menu, a thought pops into his head.“I’ve never tasted of the flesh of the swine,” he thinks, “and I have always wondered what it’s like.“Surely, if I were to order pork just this one time, God would forgive me - and besides, I’m away from home, and nob

MAY GUILD EVENT

Published on 2010-05-24 05:30:00

Jack: If they want to drink Merlot, we’re drinking Merlot.Miles Raymond: No, if anyone orders Merlot, I’m leaving. I am NOT drinking any fucking Merlot!- Sideways, 2004It’s time for another Sommelier Guild event. This one’s at Paul’s in Peachtree Hills, and it will feature Merlots of the World... Miles Raymond’s opinion notwithstanding.I’m hoping to see Denny there, although Houston Steve will, alas, be unable to attend. It promises to be a tasty affair indeed - here’s the menu

FRIDAY SATURDAY RANDOM TEN

Published on 2010-05-22 12:10:00

Yeah, I know, I know. It’s not Friday.But I spent Friday well away from the Infernal Electronickal Computational Device, running around Georgetown and other parts of the District of Columbia with Elder Daughter and the Mistress of Sarcasm. We spent the evening at Washington, D.C’s first Slideluck Potshow, an event comprising a potluck dinner and slideshow featuring the work of various visual artists. After all that, who had time to monkey around on Teh Interwebz? Today’s non-Friday Ra

TWO VIEWS

Published on 2010-05-19 07:29:00

Hakuna observes the goings-on in the kitchen from the back stairs.This image is a composite of two shots: one taken with flash, one without. I like the coffee, cream, and chocolate colors. Curled up comfortably on the ottoman.Hakuna’s blue eyes are wide open as she gives me her classic Suspicious Glare. “You ain’t planning to use that damned flashy thing, are ya?”

BRINGING IN THE SHEAVES

Published on 2010-05-18 16:22:00

Tonight marks the start of Shavuot, the Jewish Festival of Weeks... exactly fifty days from the second day of Passover.It’s a convenient holiday on which to commemorate the Giving of the Law, for which reason it is known as z’man matan torateinu. But it has ancient agricultural roots, being observed at the time of the wheat harvest. It’s when the Israelites would bring their first fruits to the Temple in Jerusalem, a time of great rejoicing.Back then, having food to eat was reason enough