Humor Articles

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Majority of Americans Favor Blunt Force Trauma Over Hillary

Posted on 11/11/2015 05:30:19 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - This morning, TNA released the results of an in-house study measuring how favorably Americans viewed Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. The results showed the longer Hillary Clinton was in the public eye the more Americans..

Mothers of GOP Candidates to Protect Them During Debate

Posted on 11/10/2015 05:24:15 PM

MILWAUKEE, WISCONSIN (The Nil Admirari) - Today, every Republican presidential candidate announced his or her mother - or other support figure - would stand next to them during tonight's debate hosted by the Fox Business Network at the Milwaukee Theater. The GOP mothers demanded they be on stage to ..

TPP to Protect American Freedom to Buy Poisonous Food

Posted on 11/09/2015 05:32:16 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, the Obama Administration announced the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP) - a massive multinational trade deal President Obama intends to sign - will protect the freedom of all Americans to unknowingly purchase poisonous food. The White House explained com..

GOP Slams Democratic Forum for Lack of Hatred of America

Posted on 11/07/2015 02:24:44 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, many of the Republican presidential candidates criticized their Democratic counterparts following the Democratic Forum held at Winthrop University in Rock Hill, South Carolina last night. The main criticism - by far - was the lack of infantile hatred of both th..

Ben Carson: Area 51 Stores My Original Brain, Sasquatches

Posted on 11/06/2015 11:41:11 AM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Republican presidential candidate and retired neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson announced the real purpose of Area 51 was to house his original brain, and a colony of Sasquatches. Carson's statement followed his declaration earlier in the week he still believ..

Study: U.S. Has Surplus of Second Amendment "Experts"

Posted on 11/05/2015 11:36:36 AM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Today, the results of a TNA study revealed the United States has a dangerous surplus of self-proclaimed Second Amendment experts that are virtually all pro-gun, and feel obligated to defend the right to bear arms no matter how many people are killed by firearms. A sta..

"Islamic State" Sends U.S. Letter of Thanks for Weapons

Posted on 11/04/2015 10:09:52 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, the White House received a letter from its enemy the Islamic State expressing the Islamic extremist group's gratitude for additional American military equipment, which it had easily captured from the fleeing Iraqi military. President Obama quickly respo..

Hawkish Hillary Considering Dick Cheney for Secretary of State

Posted on 11/02/2015 08:54:14 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, presumptuous Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton announced she was considering Dick Cheney for her old job at the U.S. Department of State. Clinton explained Cheney "made sense" as Secretary of State since her..

Jeb's Jobs Plan Fails to Get Marco Rubio Back to Work

Posted on 11/01/2015 02:13:01 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Republican presidential candidate and former Governor of Florida Jeb Bush was widely criticized for his latest jobs plan failing to get presidential rival Senator Marco Rubio (R-FL) back to work. Bush's plan was declared "a complete failure" by conserva..

Hillary to Wear Walmart Cashier Costume for Halloween

Posted on 10/31/2015 12:15:35 PM

WASHINGTON (The Nil Admirari) - Earlier today, Democratic presidential candidate and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton announced she will dress up as a Walmart cashier for Halloween. Clinton declared her costume selection was meant to inform Americans she sat on Walmart's board of directors ..

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