The single life may be smooth-sailing or a rocky road—there’s rarely an in between. Living the single life after a recent divorce, however, can cause some serious damage to your self-esteem, but only if you let it. I have told my clients, and will continue to tell them, take this new chapter with a grain of salt. Keep your mind and eyes open for new experiences; especially new relationships.
So, your marriage did not work out. Take the time to be upset; no matter what anyone tells you, you are allowed this period of mourning. But, don’t be greedy. Get back on the horse and get out into the dating world again. Whether you were a newly-wed who realized their mistake early on or you were 17 years in and your path just didn’t seem to intersect with your spouse anymore, do not be afraid to love again. You are allowed that freedom and, so not to be alone forever, should take full advantage of it.
Not only do you have the opportunity at a fresh start in a relationship, but the ability to make a transformation on yourself. Go sign up for a new gym membership or take up a hobby. Buy yourself a brand-new wardrobe and flaunt it on a night out. Start to focus all of your energy on lifting yourself out of being a “divorcee” and become a liberated single person again. Find yourself as you walk wearily through this tough situation. I can guarantee you will find someone else waiting for you on the other side.
And one last note, I constantly hear people complaining about their inability to move on from their divorce. As my husband would say, “Stop telling me what you think you can’t do, and show me what you can do.”
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