OK, “House Hunters” fans (because HGTV is just about the only channel to watch in the Summer, since there is nothing else on) answer me this: Why is it that 9 out of 10 home buyers won’t buy a house if it doesn’t have stainless steel appliances, granite counter tops, and a pretty, yet functional backsplash? I mean literally, this couple went into a house that had gorgeous new appliances and straight away the girl was like, “We need stainless steel — these will just have to go.” Why? Is there something I don’t know? Will my Tater Tots crisp better in a stainless steel oven? Will my Oreo ice cream sandwiches freeze better in a stainless steel fridge? I WANT TO KNOW! Cuz, as far as I can tell from my stainless steel toaster and blender, the stuff gets stains that stick like grass on a kids jeans.

And what’s with the granite counter tops? What is incorrect with soapstone or ceramic tile? I even saw one of the house hunters thumb their nose at a concrete counter top, which was super nice, besides being pretty pricy. So this granite phenomenon seems to not necessarily be a price thing. Anyone have any theories on this one? Does the cookie dough roll out smoother on the granite? I WANT TO KNOW! Cuz, As far as I can tell, the word on the street is that your kitchen isn’t cool without granite and that’s about it.

Now lets talk about the back splash. Back what? Cuz at first, I thought they were talking about back wash and I was thinking yucky, people spit on their kitchen walls? I had no thought what the back splash was, but I reckon its a cool word new home buyers have picked up on and they like to use it a lot to sound groovy. Does a pretty backsplash make your coffee maker glisten more?

I WANT TO KNOW! Cuz, as far as I can see, home buyers are worrying way too much about what they have been told is now a necessity and they are missing the huge picture.

I even saw a couple give up a back yard because it didn’t have all of these kitchen goodies. I am sure their golden retriever was real pleased about that choice!